Leftridge: The Dirty Dozen Top Malt Liquors for New Year’s Eve

Posted on December 31, 2011 by admin

Money’s tight. You just spent a shitload to fix your son’s cleft palette, your wife had her hours at TJ Maxx cutback so far she’s barely working at all and the student loans from your worthless animal husbandry degree are piling up faster than elephant shit at a circus. Life sucks.

But New Year’s Eve waits for no man, and you need to get lubricated and loose. Champagne’s a little rich for your blood and wine makes you blackout and do unspeakable things to your life-sized poster of Bo Jackson. So what’s that leave?

Malt liquor.

But in this battered economy, malt liquors are a dime a dozen. How does one get the most bang for their buck? Simple. I’ve designed a complex formula that utilizes alcohol content by volume, divisible by cost per cubic cent, multiplied by incident of “punching a police-horse” in the snout. Here are the winners.
 

1) Mickey’s

Good for: Pretending you’re Irish trash, BEING Irish trash, listening to House of Pain, blacking out and French kissing complete strangers. Additionally, the handy, “big-mouth-grenade” style bottle is perfect for throwing at someone, which you’ll inevitably want to do after downing a sixer. ($4.29, 6-pk)
 

2) Olde English 800

Good for: being a 1980’s rapper, getting violent diarrhea in the bushes at the park, low-riding, hang-gliding. Touted as nectar of the Gods by LL Cool J, Ice Cube and Eazy-E, “OE,” as it is affectionately known, is the perfect malt liquor for picnics and after-church gatherings. ($2.28, 40 oz)
 

3) Colt 45

Good for: accompanying your sack of really bad, really cheap Kentucky weed or standing in an alley and looking threatening. Colt 45 is a poor-man’s Olde English. Wow. Don’t sink that low, my friend. ($1.88, 40 oz)
 

4) St. Ides Special Brew

Good for: impressing ladies, hanging out at picnics or the wakes of gang members. This intoxicating delight—which comes in fruity flavors—will make your flatulence smell appealing to hobos, which, depending on your proclivities, can either be a pro, or a con.  ($2.15, 40 oz)
 

5) Camo

Good for: getting drunker than any person ever has before, murdering your family in a blind rage that you’ll never remember (but forever regret). Camo is a Miller product with up to 10.5% alcohol by volume (ABV). Remember that part where I mentioned murdering your family? Sadly, I wasn’t kidding. ($2.88, 22 oz can)
 

6) Hurricane

Good for: nothing. A St. Ides rip-off from St. Louis’ Anheuser-Busch. Save your change for bus fare and stick with the Special Brew. After all, one of these products has the endorsement of 2Pac, Dr. Dre, Snoop Dogg, Warren G, Nate Dogg, MC Eiht, Scarface, Wu-Tang Clan, Project Pat, King Tee, DJ Pooh, The Notorious B.I.G., Eric B & Rakim, EPMD, Method Man & Redman, Cypress Hill, RBL Posse, Luniz, and the Geto Boys, and one does not. ($2.98, 32 oz can)

7) Schlitz

Good for: being the grandfather of malt liquor, impressing your friends who are too hip for PBR, making Milwaukee famous. Schlitz is a solid choice no matter the occasion, and quite possibly the whitest option when it comes to malt liquor (if that’s a concern… and it shouldn’t be- you’re drinking malt liquor). ($6.59, 6 pk)
 

8) Country Club

Good for: pretending it’s something that it’s not. This is from the internet: “This beer starts off sweet with definite fruity accents. I’m picking up green apple, as well as grain husks, roasted corn, minerals, wet straw, and a touch of grassy hops. As the beer warms a bit, cooked vegetable, lemon, and alcohol notes creep out of the woodwork. The finish is short and simple with grain husk and corn notes.” This is a fucking joke, right? Anybody? ($6.19, 6 pk)
 

9) Steel Reserve

Good for: being a high-gravity lager, fucking your face up if you’re not careful. 8.1% ABV in a best case scenario, the “Reserve” provides a smooth, mellow drinking experience, followed by a dark after-period where you shit your innards out on the floor of your studio apartment while the Korean hooker that you called over sits in the corner and laughs delicately.  ($2.64, 32 oz can)
 

10) King Cobra

Good for: being a really fly-ass black dude in the 1980’s, not much else. ($1.78, 40 oz)
 

11) Carlsberg Special Brew

Good for: extra hard hooligan-rioting across the pond, pretending to have international flair when you’re very clearly just a piece of crap drinking copious amounts of malt liquor. A product from the world’s 4th largest beer brewer (and biggest seller in Russia), Carlsberg gets decidedly dangerous with their malted offering. So put on your Doc Martens, dust off those Oi! LPs and kick back with a Carlsberg Special Brew. ($3.88, 22 oz)
 

12) Coldcock Malt Liquor

Good for: not being a real thing/being a Saturday Night Live skit starring Tim Meadows.
 

Do you hear that noise? That’s your liver thanking me. You’re welcome, Mr. Liver!

Happy New Years, everyone!

 

Posted in Entertainment | Tagged | 21 Comments

Glazer: Scribe’s Holiday Flashback to His Daze in the Joint

Posted on December 29, 2011 by admin

Nobody wants to go to prison…

However you do meet some great characters at those joints. But it’s kinda like getting stuck too long at the neighborhood bar with only the one chick waitress and tons of guys that won’t shut up. This time of year I think about some of those inmates, either free, dead or back in the ‘crap house.’

Christmas was always a joy in the joint…

One year they came around with a box of gifts, NFL coffee cups. Yeah, I took the Chiefs cup. Must have been in 1986 or 1987.  We saw lots of Chiefs games because the Raiders, Chargers and Broncos were in the Western Division with KC. I spent all my time in West Coast prisons so lucky me. Winter Sundays with the Chiefs. I kept that cup for a few years before a Raider fan stole it from me and used it for rock throwing practice. Damn, I wanted that cup for a memento – oh well.

Oddly I made some great friends in the joint.

Seth Jaffe, an actor, now with his own reality show, Relapse. Seth plays the lead counselor. In prison we saw him in a few films, including a small part in St. Elmo’s Fire. Seth wrote my comedy sketch for Toastmasters. I won the region with it and it got me two furloughs. We are still buds to this day.

I also met Warren Anderson, one of the nations bigger weed dealers. He was an American living in Asia and a cool cat that took me for a ton of dough in ‘gin rummy’ and too many other card games. I had to buy him a tennis racket in prison. Today he owns part of the beach area in Bali. He lost everything he owned during his 8 year stay in prison, but bounced back on the outside. New wife, kids, owns restaurants and even a 24 Hour Fitness on his Island. He’s quite a success story. That is rare with guys who leave prison. I may go visit him this year. Sounds kinda cool.

There were some name guys, like Ivan Boesky, the  richest man to go to prison.

He was in my small dorm room at Lompoc for about a year. They used his character in the movie Wall Street. Too bad Ivan was not as cool as Michael Douglas. Ivan was a cheap bastard. I didn’t really care for him much.

There was Ed Miller, the first FBI man to go to prison. I met him at Lompoc, tough joint. He was in lock-down next to me. Poor old guy. They gave him a life sentence for selling training manuals to his Russian girlfriend. The old fella had just found a cute girl for once in his life and that’s what he got, LIFE.

I felt sorry for him and wonder if he’s still alive. Maybe the biggest name was John DeLorean. I spent a couple hours with John, he was leaving Terminal Island in Long Beach as I was coming in. I guess he did about 90 days there during his trial. Sharp dude. You never hear about him anymore, or Boesky.

There was Giuseppe Morello, a handsome low level mob kid who got out, became a gigolo in LA, married well, retired and inherited a small fortune. He was one of the lucky ones.

Paul Toomey was a San Diego Lawyer, great guy. He was about 10 years older than me and in the joint for giving advice on how to launder money to some offshore dealers. He got three years. We hung out in LA and San Diego together. He took over his brother’s business in Long Beach, then went back to prison for dealing in gold and silver contracts. I guess they didn’t have enough gold or silver to back up the certificates they sold. He’s out now – never hear from him anymore – but he did come to my wedding in 2003 and then I never saw him again.

Aaron Binder was about 25 years my senior and a pleasant man who was In for "racketeering." He was president of an LA corporation that raised more money than was needed for a new FED EX. Then some money went south and he took the hit. I think  this guy was maybe ‘not guilty’ but I’ll never know. He became like an Uncle to me when we got out. His wife and he let me stay with them when I moved back to KC. Saved me lots of money. He was partners in film group with John Voight, the actor. Aaron even owned a bowling alley in Santa Monica. He too was at my wedding. Aaron died of brain cancer a few years ago. I flew in to say goodbye to the man.

I wrote a screenplay on Club Fed that was optioned by John Heyman (Passage To India) go figure. I used all these characters in the screenplay. Mine didn’t get made – a script that sucked did – with the same name. Oddly Seth Jaffe played a convict in the film. My pal. Oh well.

These were some of the rare breed who had a shot at a good life when released.

I know hundreds more who didn’t.

Most went back to prison, some are dead and a few did well. Prison in some ways is like the Army, you make friends that you believe will last forever. My best joke on stage at Boron Camp in 1988 was, "Hey my girlfriend said, Craig I love you, I will wait for you, forever. I never knew how long forever was….it’s 29 days."

Happy New Years to everyone and all my prison pals….hope things go great for you all in 2012!

Posted in Craig_Glazer | Tagged | 44 Comments

Today: Jardine’s Saddles Up for New Year’s Eve Comeback

Posted on December 29, 2011 by admin

Amidst rumors of a deal to retool Jardine’s, the Plaza jazz club has announced plans to be open for New Year’s Eve...

"Jardines has a new team that will start on New Year’s Eve," says owner Beena Raja. "Its a party with the Pete Cole Quartet featuring the one and only Chris Clark on piano. And we will jazz it out from 8 p.m. to 1 a.m. with a $5 cover."

Attendees can opt for the four course NYE menue at $35 per person or you can order a la carte.

1st course: French onion soup or Jardines house salad

2nd course: Brushetta or fried calamari

3rd course: KC strip, Grilled Salmon w/ lemon butter or Rosemary Chicken

all served with new potatoes and asparagus

4th course: Choclate surprise with raspberry sauce
or Cheese cake with raspberries

Champagne toast and party favours at midnight

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | Tagged | 25 Comments

New Jack City: What to See This Weekend? Jack to the Rescue!

Posted on December 29, 2011 by admin

It’s been a fantastic holiday week at the boxoffice thus far…

It kicked in midday on Christmas and is primed to continue strong through New Year’s weekend. If you’ve even driven past Kansas City’s theater parking lots the past few days you know what I’m talking about.

Still haven’t decided on what to see? Let me be of help. Here are MY BEST BETS AT BOXOFFICE—by catagory:

First for ALL-AGES (family friendly) FILMS:

It’s a toss-up between Steven Spielberg‘s sweeping and epic PG-13 rated adventure of a boy’s search for his beloved horse Joey through the World War 1 battlefields of Europe in WAR HORSE—and Cameron Crowe‘s feel-good, PG-rated story of perseverence, WE BOUGHT A ZOO, starring Matt Damon and Scarlett Johansson.

In the ACTION catagory nothing comes even close to Tom Cruise with Jeremy Renner in MISSION:IMPOSSIBLE–GHOST PROTOCOL.

Cruise’s encounter with the world’s tallest building alone is worth the price of admission.

I’m also thumbs-up for Robert Downey, Jr. who back as the world’s most famous—and coolest—detective in SHERLOCK HOLMES–A GAME OF SHADOWS.

For hard-hitting DRAMA, my two current picks are director David Finche‘s americanization of THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO starring Daniel Craig and Rooney Mara—and George Clooney forced to reexamine his past and embrace his future in THE DESCENDANTS.

Finally in the COMEDY catagory—frankly, I’m not high on any current entries.

So instead I’ll move the unique black and white, silent movie THE ARTIST into the catagory, which really is in a class all its own. THE ARTIST is not for everyone. But this homage to Hollywood’s early years is a true gem and possible contender for the upcoming Academy Awards.

And those are JACK’S BEST HOLIDAY BETS at the boxoffice.

Posted in Jack_Poessiger | Tagged | 3 Comments

Leftridge: This Year in Sports

Posted on December 29, 2011 by admin

So it’s that time of year when we sit back and take stock of the “calendar that was” with a grueling list meant to encompass a million things that happened over the past 12 months. Every publication that’s worth its weight in readers compiles some sort of regurgitated inventory of “Top Sports Things That Happened,” and “2011 Highlights in the World of Athletics.” (or trout-fishing, independent movie-making, shit you ate at your in-laws for Sunday dinner, etc. You get the point)

Frankly, I find it a tedious task and I for one will not participate. People like lists because they’re easy to skim and skip around, but I ask you: do you really like lists? Or do you read them because you’re supposed to like lists?

Therefore, I will painstakingly go month-by-month through 2011 to briefly recap the highlights and the lowlights in an effort to encapsulate things that happened. In sports. Let’s start with January, since, well, since it’s the first month, I suppose.

January:

Roberto Alomar, who may or may not have AIDS (this sites too crappy for links– just google it), and Bert Blyleven are elected to the Major League Baseball Hall of Fame.

Jeff Fisher (Tennessee Titans) and Eric Mangini (Cleveland Browns) get fired, and the 49ers hire Jim Harbaugh, who I thought was really cool when I was younger because I had a football card where he had spiked hair (this is the same reason Kevin Seitzer was my favorite Kansas City Royal).

The Seahawks become the first team with a losing record to win a playoff game. Jesus weeps.

The Chiefs, who somehow won the division and weaseled their way into the playoffs, get beat like a drum by a much better Baltimore Ravens team.

Pakistan played New Zealand in cricket, a true match for the ages. Maybe. To be honest, I don’t know how to read the score. Pakistan won by 10 wickets, but it’s beyond my comprehension whether or not that’s a lot or a little. Elsewhere, India won by 21 runs. So wait… is it wickets, or runs? How in the hell does anyone win at cricket?

Auburn beats Oregon in the BCS National Championship game. I’ve gotta be honest, I don’t remember this game at all.

The NFC routs the AFC in the Pro-Bowl. Matt Cassel’s mom tells everyone she knows to watch what will ultimately be the highlight of her son’s mercurial career.

February:

The Snooker German Masters were held in Berlin. I have no idea what “snooker” is, or who won, but Thanawat Thirapongpaiboon was knocked out in the “Last 32” round, which I’m sure was upsetting to Mr. Thirapongpaiboon.

The Green Bay Packers beat the Pittsburgh Steelers in the Super Bowl, 31-25. Hey, remember when the Chiefs took Derrick Johnson instead of Aaron Rodgers in the 2005 NFL draft? Yeah, me too. (to be fair, DJ is shaping up to be a very nice linebacker, and 23 other picks were made before Rodgers… but still)

The Cleveland Cavaliers set a record for futility with their 25th straight loss. “Is there anything worse than being a fan of Cleveland sports? Probably not.” –Guy Who Somehow Accidentally Got his Dick Caught In a Blender

Celtics’ bald-guy Ray Allen—who played a guy named Jesus in a Spike Lee movie—sets the NBA record for career three-pointers, surpassing Reggie Miller (who always seemed like a secret-asshole to me). 

March:

NFL: “Hey everybody! Let’s get locked the f*** out!”

March Madness sweeps the country, denting the productivity of a nation and embarrassing the shit out of you when your wife inevitably does better on her bracket than you do. “But why WOULDN’T I pick Butler?! Bulldogs are so cute!” K-State and Mizzou get bumped pretty early in the proceedings and the perpetually first-seeded Kansas Jayhawks lose in Kansas-like fashion to a much lower ranked team (Virginia Commonwealth, ladies and gentlemen).

April:

In college basketball’s national championship game, Connecticut beats Butler in a horribly boring battle that pits surprising ineptitude against marginally staunch defense. No one except Connecticut and Butler will remember this game three months after it transpires.

*Homerun King Barry Bonds gets charged with obstruction of justice for perjuring himself, and it’s not nearly as sexy as it sounds. (See what I did there? With the asterisk? That’s called “minimalist-editorializing.” BAM.)

The NBA playoffs started, and not many people cared. The NHL playoffs started, too, and even fewer people cared.

May:

Bubba Watson beats Webb Simpson in the PGA Tour’s Zurich Classic of New Orleans. Watson celebrates by getting a tattoo on his abdomen in old English letters that says, “Shock the World.” He succeeds only in shocking his wife, who he failed to consult.

“Animal Kingdom” wins the Kentucky Derby in horseracing, which is hardly a sport, so I’m sorry I brought it up.

June:

The Dirk Nowitzki led Mavericks finally win something important, which was kind of cool, even if you DO find Mark Cuban to be a bit of an obnoxious asshole. Oh, and hey—here’s the problem with basketball AND hockey: too many teams get in and it takes too freaking long from start to finish. Remember back in April when I said both the NHL and the NBA playoffs were starting? Yeah, neither wrapped up until almost mid-June. Way to go, dorks.

Speaking of, the Boston Bruins won the Stanley Cup. Neat.

Northern Ireland’s own Rory McIlroy wins the US Open, with a record 72-hole aggregate score of 268 (16 under par), laying to rest the myth that white guys can’t win at golf. I know a guy of Irish heritage who’s also into golf, so he was really pumped up about this.

July:

Realizing that they’re all acting like a bunch of entitled bitches, the NFL owners and the Player’s Association vote to end the NFL lockout. Teams scramble through a hasty free-agency period. Chiefs coach Todd Haley acts like an idiot with his preseason management and a bunch of key Chiefs’ players blow their knees to smithereens. Haley will later be fired, much to no one’s surprise.

Lifelong New York Yankee Derek Jeter collects his 3,000th hit, becoming only the 28th major leaguer to do so. Other than that, Jeter continues his downward talent-slide into worthlessness.

August:

In baseball, Jim Thome hit his 600th homerun, the Cubs fired General Manager Jim Hendry, Justin Verlander notched his 20th victory on his way to Cy Young and MVP, and former Royals “power-house” Mike Jacobs was released by the minor league affiliate of the Colorado Rockies after testing positive for HGH, the first player to do so since testing was implemented.

September:

Novak Djokovic defeats Rafael Nadal in the US Open. I’m confused, because I thought Rory McIlroy won this.

NFL: “Hey everybody, it’s us! Sorry about that!” Professional football starts, and life can finally resume. The Chiefs look like crap, the Bills look great and the Redskins start strong. Like the great poet C. Thomas Howell once said, “nothing gold can stay.”

October:

Baseball playoffs kick everyone in the scrotum with their sheer awesomeness. Technically, the excitement begins in September with historic collapses by both the Atlanta Braves and the Boston Red Sox, allowing the St. Louis Cardinals and Tampa Bay Rays to make the postseason as Wild Card contenders. The Cardinals make the most of their mighty run, winning the World Series against the Texas Rangers.

33 year-old racecar driver Dan Wheldon dies after sustaining injuries in lap 11 of the IZOD IndyCar World Championship in Las Vegas, reminding us that life is fragile. This is especially true when doing something inherently dangerous like driving a car at 225 mph. RIP, Dan. 

November:

Sporting KC—nee the Kansas City Wiz, nee the Kansas City Wizards—lose in the MLS Conference Finals, 2-0 to the Houston Dynamo. For a while, everyone was excited about soccer in Kansas City, which was pretty cool.

Former Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky earns a special place on this list of “History’s Greatest Monsters” after allegations arise that he sexually molested young boys both during and after his tenure with the Nittany Lions. Interesting Wikipedia side-note: in 2001’s ridiculously appropriately titled auto-biography, “Touched: The Jerry Sandusky Story,” Sandusky claims that his father once told him “[Y]ou could mess up a free lunch.” Yeah, mess it up. And rape it. Here’s to hoping that this demon’s Golden Years are spent getting repeatedly dry anal-raped by a syphilitic, barbed-wire penis.

Mizzou leaves the Big XII after months of speculation and internet-fueled hearsay.

December:

The Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim shock the baseball world by signing a virtual unknown from Ft. Osage named Allen Pujols. Pujols, who had moderate success with St. Louis Cardinals organization, signs a 10 year contract worth $254,000.00, making him one of the wealthiest baseball guys in the history of baseball. (Herm: please fact-check this section. Thanks!)

(editor’s note: not to be confused with Albert Pujols $254 million deal with the same team)

Floyd “Money” Mayweather gets sentenced to 90 days in jail for domestic violence charges stemming from an incident involving his boo. His time is set to begin January 6th, and could be significantly reduced with good behavior. Hopefully, this time will be spent reading, reflecting, and becoming a better person deciding to fight Manny “Pow-Pow” Pacquiao.

So there it is. The most comprehensive, thorough examination of absolutely everything important that happened in sports over the past year. I dare you find something that I left out. Come on… I dare you. In fact, I’m so confident that this collection is without fail, I’ll put up my compensation for penning this piece ($10 gift certificate to Jardine’s) if you can prove me wrong.

Best of luck, and have a great 2012, everybody.

Posted in Sports | Tagged | 6 Comments

Mermaid: The Dirty Dozen Top Champagnes for New Year’s Eve

Posted on December 29, 2011 by admin

The Top 10 (OK 12) Champagnes for New Year’s Eve

New Year’s Eve is coming and you don’t feel like paying 100 bucks to go to a bar for the night but still wanna get your drink on and celebrate the new year or say goodbye to a really bad one.

Here’s my list of the top 12 (just couldn’t narrow it to 10) champagnes I love.

1. Moet & Chandon Imperial (same as discontinued White Star) Approx. $45

2. Charles Heidsieck Brut Reserve Approx. $45

3. Barefoot Bubbly California Premium Extra Dry (Good if you are on a budget) Approx. $9

4 .Veuve Clicquot Non-Vintage Brut Yellow Label Approx. $45

5. Laurent-Perrier Grande Siecle Approx. $85

6. Piper Heidsieck Cuvee Brut Approx.  $45

7. Schramsberg Blanc de Blanc Approx. $35

8. Schramsberg Brut Rose (Pink) Approx. $35

9. J.Schram Schramsberg Approx $75

10. Perrier Jouet Fleur de Champagne Rose (Pink) Approx. $200

11. Dom Perignon Approx. $150

12. Roederer Cristal Approx. $300 and up

Posted in News_and_Views | Tagged | 44 Comments

Sounds Good: Split Lip@Bottleneck, Minden@RecordBar

Posted on December 28, 2011 by admin

 

Some call it amateur night…

You know, New Year’s Eve.

To the hardcore drinkers and scenesters it’s a night to make fun of those slobbering fools who can’t handle their shizz getting totally, stupidly wrecked.

"Too many amateurs on the road tonight, I’m staying in," they say. "Those rookies really need to leave the drunk driving to us professionals."

They look disgusted and feel invaded, like they’ve earned the right to party by paying their dues in all the dark, dirty bars seven nights a week. Then their liver jumps out of their chest and strangles them to death…

 

Saturday, December 31st, New Year’s Eve

Split Lip Rayfield at the Bottleneck in Lawrence

Who here has never seen Split Rip Rayfield?  If your hand is in the air, get your ass to the Bottleneck for an old school, Kansas style bluegrass beatdown.  Though the band took a hard hit a few years ago with the death of founding member and all around firecracker Kirk Rundstrom, the Rayfield boys have rebounded nicely as a three piece.  Lead 
man Wayne Gottstine blazes the trail on mandolin with a picking style so fast you can barely see his fingers flying around the tiny frets.  If I could move my hand that fast I’d never leave the house.

Expect to hear all the favorites on this night of revelry, including the insanely speedy Record Shop and Old #6, the classic laments Whiskey Is Gone and Used to Call Me Baby, and probably any others you request.  These guys are pros, they always aim to please and they put on one helluva good show.

And yes, the rumors are true- Jeff Eaton plays a one string bass that is actually a gas tank from a 1965 Ford.  Seriously. 

Also on the bill is relative newcomers Dumptruck Butterlips, who are kind of a gypsy hippy new-grass soul kind of deal, with several scantily clad ladies playing everything from the washboard, to the fiddle, to the standup bass (sans gas tank) for your listening and viewing pleasure.  Plus a bearded dude.  But don’t think this act is all style and no substance.  Quite the contrary actually.  They’ve been gaining traction on the local and national scene, scoring a slot at Yonder Mountain String Band’s Harvest Festival a couple months ago in Arkansas.

Listen to Split Lip here: http://www.splitliprayfield.com/
Listen to Dumptruck Butterlips here: http://dumptruckbutterlips.com/

 

Minden, Capybara, and Ghosty at the RecordBar in KC

Last time Minden played in Lawrence was for the 11.11.11 deal that Jacki Becker put on with, like, eight thousand bands.  They were in the cramped and sweaty basement of the 8th Street Tap Room getting ready to come on after some guy who was playing a bongo and rapping about a burrito, I think.  I asked Minden’s guitar player what kind of stuff they play, trying to gauge whether or not I should bolt to one of the other venues packed with Jacki’s minions.  "Sex music," he replied a little confrontational-like.  "Oh, so like, Marvin Gaye?" I pressed.  Not exactly. 

I think I finally pinned him down with the label of "heavy rock" or something.  So I stuck around.  And they were good, real good.  On their Facebook page they seem to embrace the description of their band as "pop," eschewing the "fresh and cleverly-named genres."  Like sex music?  Word.   

Listen to Minden here:  http://www.facebook.com/mindenband?sk=app_204974879526524  

Posted in Entertainment | Tagged | 3 Comments

Today: The Sad Demise of David R. Spivey Books, Maps & Fine Arts in Westport

Posted on December 28, 2011 by admin

Chalk one up for Father Time and the Internet…

In a matter of days, a 33 year-old Westport institution – David R. Spivey Books, Maps & Fine Art – will take it’s place in the history books.

"I’m alright, I’m just retiring," says Spivey. "I’m in the process of selling everything."

Spivey sold the building at 825 Westport Road to neighbor Joe Zwillenberg of the Westport Flea Market.

Spivey’s Web site says, "David R. Spivey has been buying, selling and appraising old maps, rare books and fine art since 1978. Over the years, Spivey’s has grown to be the largest old map, print and book dealer in the Midwest…We have five floors of maps, prints, fine art and books. Our building dates to 1910 and sits on the old Santa Fe trail in historic Westport."

The liquidation is being held in the form of an online auction ending January 4th and 5th.

"It’s sad," Spivey says. "But I can’t do anything anymore, I’m confined to my bedroom. I’m 75 but I feel like I’m old."

Spivey’s favorite item?

"Actually my favorite thing was a document concerning the Territory of Kansas from 1853," he says. "But I donated that to the library."

Memories? Spivey has plenty.

"It was a fun business," he says. "It was a lot of fun, but like a lot of businesses, the Internet changed things. And people who didn’t know very much and had very little experience could go online and learn and see everything. They didn’t have to come to my store anymore."

From a health standpoint, "I have Alzheimers, I’m afraid," Spivey says. "It’s hard for me to remember."

Prior to breaking into the map and doc racket, Spivey spent 30 years working with the juvenile court here.

Any famous celebrtity customers?

"Yeah, remember that woman that sang, ‘a brand new pair of rollerskates’- Melanie? She came in. And there was another guy who was a writer for Richard Nixon and his name began with an ‘S’ – oh, Safire – William Safire. He was in a couple times."

The love of Spivey’s life "ran off with somebody right after my cancer operation 15 years ago," he says. "Her name was Patty."

Spivey’s high point: "Oh gee, I don’t know. My memory’s shot."

The low: "Probably now, closing it down."

Next up:  "I’m becoming a movie expert," Spivey quips. "I’m watching movies every night – all day and all night."

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | Tagged | 4 Comments

Hearne: The KC Confidential Comments Section Cleanup

Posted on December 28, 2011 by admin

To the majority of KC Confidential readers and commenters, I salute you…

Instead of one or two word, anonymous putdown comments (like a certain local blog) or allowing no comments at all (like another), KCC gets mostly some pretty entertaining and thoughtful comments. The "stage names" may shield their identities, but most KCC commenters think things through and bring something to the table in the way of suggestions and/or criticism.

They may get carried away with the ALL-CAPS button or unleash an ungentlemanly word here or there, but for the most part they’re an important ingredient to the overall mix of ideas and viewpoints on this site.

Then there are the odd haters…

Let me rephrase that – the twisted, sick-sounding commenters who darken this site on occasion with crude language, scary senses of humor and vile expressions. Often directed towards Craig "meet me after school" Glazer.

While these outbursts are fairly rare, a little goes a long way.

They’re disturbing to read (before I can delete and/or block them) and it’s kinda frightening to think there are losers like this actually walking about free in society. And the sad reality is that all it takes is one loser to mess up the sandbox.

So I’d like to apologize for the odd such comment that slips into the site. We are still working on the transition to a new format that will allow for better screening of these idiots.

Meanwhile, I’ll keep Glaze under control and look forward to moving forward, sans the depravity.

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | Tagged | 18 Comments

Glazer: Two Backup Pro Bowlers for Chiefs Says it All

Posted on December 28, 2011 by admin

Yep, Derrick Johnson will finally go to Honolulu on January 29th…

He sure did earn that trip. And Tamba Hali will return to the Pro Bowl. Both as back-ups. Hali did not play last year so this time he will likely see some action.

Nobody on the Chiefs offense even got a sniff.

Oh the guy we fired, Brian Waters, he’s going to the Pro Bowl but from New England. You know, the guys who have home field advantage in the playoffs. Brian was sure sad to leave, right. He was past it – uh-huh – pro bowl guy.

Dwayne Bowe is not on the list (he was last year).  Bowe may yet make it as a reserve if one of the other guys is hurt or can’t play. He too was a shadow of himself last season. Bowe scored only five touchdowns this season – last year he had a boatload.

When your best offensive player isn’t being called, that tells you loudly how bad your offense has become.

All the talk about, "Who will run this team next year?" – does it even matter? 

The division will remain weak. Our defense could be solid. We could win the division with just an OK offense and a B defense – 9 or 10 wins – that’s not unlikely.

More than we want to hear it, Matt THE FRANCHISE will start again next year. Kyle Orton is performing for TV as a try-out quarterback for five or six other bad teams. Kyle is still fairly young, and is a solid B- quarterback. The Vikings and 6 other lousy teams will likely offer him a three year $15 million or more package.

Will the Chiefs? They would have to dump Matt.

We all agree Kyle is a step up, but barely. They are both low level play-off quarterbacks if the rest of the team is average or above. That is likely what the Chiefs will be next year. Maybe.

Without a quarterback – and we don’t have one in sight – no team will go deep in the playoffs or to a Super Bowl.

So this Chiefs team – barring a miracle – is out of any real Super Bowl race for years to come.

Fans will have to settle for, WE MADE THE PLAYOFFS. WE WON A POST SEASON GAME!!!!!  WE GOT MAIL….YEAH GREAT!

That’s the best we can do. So if that makes you happy, have at it. For me, it’s been just too long a wait. One average team going to one post season game and getting smashed. Like last year. It just doesn’t thrill me anymore. Twenty years since a post season win for the Chiefs, half century since a Super Bowl.

My Lord.

What more do you fans expect for 100 bucks a ticket and $10 dollar beers?

Posted in Craig_Glazer | Tagged | 13 Comments

New Jack City: For All That Was Bad at the Movies In 2011, Here’s What Made it Worthwhile

Posted on December 27, 2011 by admin

Last week was my lineup of movie stinkers..

Now here are the movies that made my twisted life as a critic all worth it.

My 10 favorite films to play in Kansas City during 2011:
 
# 1—THE HELP—Great ensemble film. Lots of kudos all around but for some reason Emma Stone isn’t getting enough of them for her superb performance as Skeeter.
 
# 2—THE IDES OF MARCH—Here’s the great American political story with dream casting of Gosling, Clooney, Hoffman, Tomei & Giamatti—not to mention superb direction by Mr. Clooney himself.
 
# 3—MONEYBALL—Pitt, Hill & Hoffman. This past year’s triple threat. And what a breakthrough for slimmed down Jonah Hill.
 
# 4—THE DESCENDANTS—Proof that George Clooney is rapidly becoming one of the our best all around actors,
 
# 5—BRIDESMAIDS—Funniest movie this past year propelling Kristen Wiig to Hollywood’s A-List.
 
# 6—MIDNIGHT IN PARIS—It’s been a long time coming but this movie is proof that the real Woody Allen is back and here to stay.
 
# 7—DRIVE—Film noir at its best with cool Ryan Gosling proving that there are no clean getaways.
 
# 8—THE TREE OF LIFE—Director Terrance Malik, Brad Pitt, Sean Penn and Jessica Chastain make for spiritual grace on the big screen.
 
# 9—WAR HORSE—Did I feel manipulated by Steven Spielberg here? Sure I did—and I loved it.
 
# 10–MISSION:IMPOSSIBLE-GHOST PROTOCOL—Best of the franchise! Tom Cruise vs. the tallest building in the world alone worth the price of a ticket.
 
Other pleasant cinematic surprises enjoyed in dark theater auditoriums during the past year included the following set of 10 titles–and in no particular order:
 
THE ARTIST / SUPER 8 / THE DEBT / RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES / CRAZY STUPID LOVE / 50/50 / HORRIBLE BOSSES / PUSS IN BOOTS / MARGIN CALL & CEDAR RAPIDS.
 
Agree or disagree—Just keep repeating: "It’s only a movie. Only a movie. Only a movie. Take as much as you can."
 
Happy New Year everyone.

Posted in Jack_Poessiger | Tagged | 9 Comments

Glazer: Westwood Greenlights Huge, New Woodside Redevelopment Project

Posted on December 27, 2011 by admin

A major break-through for Westwood and Johnson County is finally happening…

Woodside Health & Tennis has been trying for years to gain approval from the locals to expand its popular tennis and fitness club into a huge complex for high-end apartment living, shopping, a larger health club, children’s facilities, a new lap indoor pool and  tons more.

This is huge.

The plan was approved this week to move the project forward. Owner Blair Tanner and crew now have the backing of Westwood to make it all happen. Tanner hopes construction will begin very soon, by this summer.

Make no mistake, this will be a game changer for Westwood and north eastern Johnson County. The huge complex will offer shops, retail, grocery, top notch apartments for young professionals,empty nesters and the upper income, status folks of this area.

New streets and sidewalks will make the city nicer, safer and provide lots of eye candy.

Blair wants the new complex to be inviting to families as well as singles.

Tanner and his staff have worked long and hard to make this happen for Westwood. He’s has already upgraded Woodside to be the area’s leading country clubs. Absent a golf course. Woodside’s membership of now over 3,000 and a who’s who of Johnson County.

This is a big win for Westwood, Johnson County and Woodside. Nice job.

I can’t wait to see this big boy completed – I might even have to live there.

Posted in News_and_Views | Tagged | 18 Comments

Mermaid: From Pet Chipping to Human Chipping, The Fix Is In

Posted on December 27, 2011 by admin

RFID, I hadn’t thought much about these letters until the recent Wal Mart scandal…

The one where the company is embedding chips in clothing – mostly underwear and jeans – to "keep track of inventory."  Radio-Frequency Identification should be something you start thinking about a lot these days.

Is it Big Brother or a helpful chip for times of trouble, such as a bad accident or a kidnapping of a child?

I for one find myself slightly sick at the notion of a chip being embedded in my skin. But this is exactly what the government is planning on implementing starting in 2013 as part of President Obama‘s healthcare bill.

If you are just hearing about this for the first time, listen up.

RFID has already been approved by the FDA and is a doctrine written into Obama’s new health care plan which states that everyone in the American population must have it for "medical purposes."

I don’t know about you but this has all the markings of a Fascist movement to me.

As a matter of fact, it scares the living daylights out of me. We already put these chips in our dogs and cats so I don’t know why I am surprised they want to do this to humans.

I can think of some good it could do- Alzheimer’s patients wandering off, a kidnapping, an unlocated murder victim- but it stops there and becomes an evil spawning that I really want no part of.  I suppose we will all have an identifiable number.

Doesn’t this conjure up visions of the Holocaust or George Orwell‘s 1984? Does to me.

The year 2013 will be approaching quickly and we should all be asking some questions. Who will submit to this? Who will resist? Will states require citizens to comply and what happens if we refuse? Will we be refused medical treatment if we do not have a chip? What will the parameters be and how will it be used? Will the states and government abuse their power?

Wake up and smell the bad coffee because I am not making this horror story up. Read it and weep.

Posted in News_and_Views | Tagged | 23 Comments

Today: A Christmas Olive Branch from Jardine’s Owner to Local Jazz Musicians

Posted on December 26, 2011 by admin

In an open letter to Kansas City jazz musicians, Jardine’s owner Beena Raja reached out Christmas Day in an attempt to mend fences and restore sanity to an out-of-control situation that has resulted in the club’s going dark much of the past three weeks.

That after Raja found a handful of her staff drinking illegally at the club at 4 a.m. Thanksgiving morning. Jardine’s general manager / cook then resigned. Two staffers were fired, a third walked out and confusion over what had gone down lead other staffers to believe they too had been fired.

An incident with one server, whose father is a leading member of the local jazz community, resulted in the father calling for other musicians to boycott Jardine’s.

It’s been downhill from there.

Will Raja’s reaching out to musicians work? Is it too late?

Here’s Raja’s late night letter:

"To All,

You don’t know the facts of why this happened.

I had a great time doing what I do.I welcome anybody that can take over and do what I have done since 2003. I think you were praising me for a while. Dont forget most of you hated (former Jardine’s owner) Greg Halstead. He was the bad guy. I guess I am the one now. It’s how it is. No big deal.

You need me to leave KC? No. That’s not your call.I am a citizen just like you.

I have paid everyone and treated everyone with respect (musicians and employees) and have paid more to all since 2003 when I took over and have hired more musicians and supported Jazz in this city and made Jardines what it is.

Am I hurt? Yes.

 Did I make a penny. I did not. I worked for you guys.I am happy. I am not complaining.

I am not perfect. I do not claim to be.

I do know most of you. I loved every minute of getting to know you. I spoke and listened.

I know who I am. You may be better.

I enjoyed working with all my employees and you musicians. I did not even know Jazz and still do not.

Yes, I am from India, but very proud to be an American.This country gave me the opportunity to be who I am.

No regrets. You don’t know me. Thanks for the Opportunity that you gave me to get better!! I did it.

You cannot put me down. I refuse to. It’s my style, my faith, my truth and my integrity and I was not trying to prove that to you. I don’t care at this point.

 This journey may be over. If it is, I will embark on the next one.I am not afraid.

I wish everyone a Happy New Year!!!

Sincerely,

Beena"

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | Tagged | 62 Comments

Glazer: King of Sting Dabs Away a Tear & Sends Out Holiday Best Wishes

Posted on December 25, 2011 by admin

With the Lone Ranger it was, "How did you get to be the Lone Ranger?" 

With me its, "How did you become the King of Sting?" Well, it started very early in life for me -very early.

When I could barely speak or walk, my Grandma, Nanny Mary, took me to see the Disney movie OLD YELLER.  Around 1958 or so. The picture starred Fess Parker (of Davy Crockett Fame), Dorothy McGuire, Tommy Kirk (Musketeers) and my favorite kid actor, Kevin Corcoran, a Disney super star at like age 9.

Chuck Connors (of Rifleman fame) had a small part in it. Chuck traded Kevin a puppy for a frog. And while Kevin’s dad, went off to sell cattle the boys stayed home to keep an eye on mom.

While Old Yeller kept an eye on them all.

There was lots of action, mean bulls and later a rabbid wolf that was loose on the prowl. Old Yeller was deeply loved by the family, especially Kevin. They even slept together. He was a wonderful, sweet dog. He even had a song about him they sang throughout the film.

I loved that song and I loved Old Yeller.

Who wouldn’t? He was everyone’s best friend.

As the film drew near the end, the rabid wolf came to kill the family and their livestock. He was mean, he was ugly and he was a killer! Old Yeller wouldn’t let that wolf harm the family he loved, so Old Yeller fought that wolf to the death.

Old Yeller won, but he was badly hurt though. He slowly got sick with rabies and Kevin wouldn’t hear of putting down the animal he loved so deeply. No way. He would mend Old Yeller back to health no matter how long it took. But it didn’t work out.

One day Kevin went into the cage to see if Old Yeller was better, but the dog was so sick he growled and even tried to bite the boy. Old Yeller was so ill, he didn’t recognize Kevin at first, but when he did he stopped. Kevin’s older brother saw this and knew he had to be the man of the family at 12.

He took the dog we all loved and shot him – he killed Old Yeller.

I cried and cried and cried.

I was so shocked that I asked my Nanny, "He’s not really dead is he?" She wanted me to stop crying and said, "No, its just a movie." 

To me though it was real. I was sad for weeks.

I got a puppy, Tiger, and had him until I went away to college. I became a strong animal lover. I could never hurt an animal. They are so warm and nice, cats, dogs, horses.

Funny, I didn’t always feel that way towards people.

Once in a great while they play OLD YELLER on television and I still watch it. I watched it last year with my dog Junior.

No, thats not how I became the King of Sting, but it’s why I was not a killer.

I loved Old Yeller too much. When I hold my dog, I often think of Old Yeller, and what a great friend he was to those people and that kid.

Even ‘bad guys’ can have a heart….Merry, Merry Holidays to All of You!

Posted in Craig_Glazer | Tagged | 17 Comments

Christmas 2011: Through the Past Darkly into Year Four

Posted on December 25, 2011 by admin

Merry Christmas…

It’s been quite a year for KC Confidential. Lots of comings and goings – some planned, others not. But for the most part readers have stuck with us through good times and bad. We’re ending the year on a high note with readership up dramatically from where we were just last spring.

How much are we up?

More than double what we started the summer with, and up 90 percent the past three months and well over 300 percent in the last 30 days.

It’s not been easy.

While some of us – starting with me – may appear at times cavalier covering delicate topics like the three recent suicides, the dramatic fall of Kansas City’s top jazz club or the transgressions of a former colleague, trust me, it’s not that simple.

These are very difficult stories to wade into for the risk adverse, and some of that wading can get more than a little prickly at times – clumsy even. However, we’ve tried to be transparent, while providing an open window into the news gathering process. Instead of playing it safe and waiting for the smoke to clear. The key is following up on the news as it unfolds.

And there is no shortage of critical comments that stand in evidence, challenging some of those stories.

That said, we’ve cracked down to an extent on a handful of the more vulgar, libelous and/or ill conceived entries into KCC‘s comments section.

We’re not running a sewer here, nor a haven for very small brains attached to very big mouths.

I’d like to take a moment to salute two of KCC‘s more frequent targets, The Star and The Pitch.

Make no mistake, they’re both quite easy to bag on. The Star because it’s the dominant source of news in Kansas City and because all too often, it acts like it -they’re control freaks by nature.

In the case of the Pitch, mostly because it’s fighting a difficult battle for survival. Yeah, they’re a bit full of themselves at times as well – less so lately – like mindlessly churning out "best of" awards, while making no attempt whatsoever to try and make the winners – even the deserving ones – appear truly credibile. Which they easily could do.

Despite the doomsayers and it’s critics, the Star has a lot to offer and is going to be around for a long time – probably what passes for forever. The Pitch on the other hand could very well go the way of the Johnson County Sun, and that would be tragic.

Can you imagine living in a print media / pop culture media world lorded over by a publication as vapid as Ink?

Let’s not wish that on ourselves.

With luck, the Pitch‘s new owners in Nashville will survive long enough to weather this economy and the dwindling, younger readership. Do we really want to rely on a single corporate entity – the Star – for the lion’s share of our formal news and information?

As we move forward into a new year – KCC’s fourth – I’d like to thank all of you for hanging with us. With luck, we’ll have plenty of edgy, funny, entertaining – at times maybe even insightful – news and opinions to share with you in 2012.

That’s the plan, anyway. Thanks for sharing your time.

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | Tagged | 18 Comments

Glazer: Chiefs Lose, Pull Scribe’s Chestnuts Out of The Fire

Posted on December 24, 2011 by admin

I know due to all the local attention I got for MY BET, most people wanted me to lose…

I had tons of calls last week during the Packer upset from "concerned" friends. Meaning their real thoughts were…I HOPE YOU CRASH AND BURN. Hey, that’s human nature.

Remember, almost nobody most of you readers know has EVER placed a bet in a sports book in Vegas.

Thus the confusion over the who, what, when, where and why of many of my teaser bets. Most people only bet with friends in pools or not at all. One percent or less have ever made a real bet in Vegas with a sports concern. Sure, they’ve lost at blackjack – so did my grandma.

But only the big boys dare to dare.

Speaking of which, I think Johnny Dare was pulling for me deep down.

Anyway, I’m not mad at the haters and the doubters. That’s human nature. It was a fun ride. My brother is in on the bet and we may just go out there and party with it for a few days.

It hurts more when you lose than how good it feels when you win.

Somewhere the birds are chirpping; somewhere kids are playing – but here in mighty Mudville the mighty Chiefs have struck out!!!!!! 

Sorry, losers lose.

P.S. They have built a good defense to move forward with and one day with a good quarterback they will soar.

Chin up and Merry Christmas!

Posted in Craig_Glazer | Tagged | 7 Comments

Glazer: Scribe Calls Upon Great Santa to Win Bet, Guide This Week’s Picks

Posted on December 24, 2011 by admin

Thanks to this site and Johnny Dare, the Craig season bet is on the line for the next 8 days…

The Chiefs play Oakland tomorrow and Denver next weekend. The Bronco’s may not need the game, if they win and the Chargers lose this weekend it’s over, Raiders win the division. So Denver might not play as hard at home next week – I don’t know. So I likely need the RAIDERS, THE HATED RAIDERS to help me…Damn. Who knew?

Last week I sucked on picks, the worst of the year. But overall, the year has been very good. Let’s get back on track, shall we? Ok, lets do it.

All I want for Christmas is one Chiefs loss…Santa, oh Santa…..

College:

Still soft until next week but we got our local guys playing like Missouri so…

I think the Tigers win but fairly close, NC may cover.

North Carolina 11 1/2 (tease with So Miss) 6 on each must win both to win Over MU

So.Mississippi -3  over Nevada (tease)

Pros:

Oakland 9 over KC (tease)

Rams 18 over Steelers (tease with Oakland)

Chargers 3 over Detroit

New Orleans – 7 over Atlanta

San Fran -1 over Seattle

Green Bay -5 1/2 over Chicago (tease with Saints)
so in this bet Saints are -1 over Atlanta….

Merry Xmas…Santa PLEASE….

Posted in Craig_Glazer | Tagged | 21 Comments

Jack Goes Confidential: Steven Spielberg Dishes Up Top Notch Family Fare

Posted on December 24, 2011 by admin

The WAR HORSE is rated PG-13 because it contains battlefield sequences that may be too intense for young kids.

Having said that, let’s applaud director Steven Spielberg for delivering the type of epic adventure film here we just don’t see much anymore.

WAR HORSE is an odyssey-like story of a boy’s pursuit of his horse Joey which has been drafted by the British army by an England on the brink of joining the European conflict World War 1.

This is vintage Spielberg storytelling with memorable performances from what are essentially unknown actors.

Some of the scenes of the horse on the battlefield will tear your heart out as movie meister Spielberg manipulates us to the hilt. And that’s a good thing!

All in a sweeping portrayal that can only be fully enjoyed on the big screen.

WAR HORSE is must-see movie fare—and I’m proudly raising 4 out of 5 fingers.

It gallops into theaters this Sunday (Christmas Day) citywide.
 
Happy Holiday everyone.

Posted in Jack_Poessiger | Tagged | Leave a comment

Jack Goes Confidential: Cameron Crowe’s ‘Zoo’ Delivers Exceptional Family-Fun

Posted on December 23, 2011 by admin

Typecasting a film as a ‘Family Movie’ can often backfire…

It’s such a broad term and can be a turnoff to adult moviegoers. Well we’ve got two such branded cinematic entries in Kansas City this holiday weekend and the good news is that both do the description justice.

The first is director Cameron (JERRY MAGUIRE) Crowe’s funny, inspirational true story about the magical power of family to persevere in the face of extraordinary challenges.

In WE BOUGHT A ZOO, recently widowed father Matt Damon wants to move away from it all. Give his kids a freshy start and outlook. That’s when he buys an old estate attached—and part of—a delapidated wildlife park.
In other words he bought a zoo that’s at least 9 miles from the nearest Target store and in bad need of refurbishing.

Scarlett Johansson is the caretaker of its 200 animal inhabitants.

Is Damon now in over his head? What do you think?

Suffice it to say, it all works and delivers a cross between BLIND SIDE and MARLEY & ME— with touches of TERMS OF ENDEARMENT in the mix.

WE BOUGHT A ZOO also features Thomas Haden Church and Elle Fanning, Dakota’s sister.

I’m recommending it with 3-1/2 out of 5 family-friendly fingers.

Posted in Jack_Poessiger | Tagged | 2 Comments