Glazer: God Hates Denver and Tim Tebow, Loves Tom Brady and New England

The Lord pissed all over Tim Tebow yesterday…

He let New England and the best quarterback of all-time, Tom Brady, destroy Denver and Tebow. It was ugly and it was fast. Brady had New England in the end zone in two minutes. By the first quarter’s end it was over.

New England had 21 points – game, set match.

Tim did manage to fumble once to set up a New England score early on. Good one. Yep, God surely hates Tim Tebow and his legion of fans. He let them die, in public, on national TV, for all the world to see.

Crucified.

First off, as nearly half of the educated world will attest to, there is no God.

There also is no boogy man, Santa or Easter Bunny. Unless you include the ones at the toy store. You can even buy a baby Jesus picture or a plastic cross ensemble for your dash board. They’re at most CVS’s and K-MARTS and they’re cheap – there you go Tim.

I like Tim Tebow, he’s a good, young, rookie quarterback.

He’ll be back next year and will lead his team into battle hard for the division title.

And he’ll get better. Tebow had a great year and according to polls, is the most popular athlete in America.

Brady plays next week in his 7th AFC title game, a record. He may go on to win his fourth Super Bowl eventually, tying Joe Montana and Terry Bradshaw. He is without any argument the best quarterback we will ever see.

And that includes, Aaron Rodgers, Drew Brees, Montana, Big Ben, Rodger the Dodger and all comers. At least for now. Tom has now been at the top for 12 years which is hard to do. It’s never been done at this level. Aaron may get there one day, but that’s a long shot.

Brady made Tim Tebow look like the rookie he is.  Yes, I know its his second year in the NFL, but his first as a starting quarterback.

Look out Aaron and Eli, here comes the judge, TOM BRADY.

Oh yeah, maybe God loves Tom, have you seen his wife? Have you seen Tom? I rest my case.

P.S. New England 45 Denver 10.

Posted in Craig_Glazer | Tagged | 18 Comments

Leftridge: NFL Playoffs, Take 2; An In-Depth Analysis of Murderers, Dragons & Chapped-Lips

Like the late, great Jerry Reed said, “when you’re hot, you’re hot.

Perhaps more importantly, he followed that up with, “when you’re not, you’re not.” And when it comes to picking playoff football, my friends, I am not. I’d feel bad about this if I prided myself on my ability to accurately predict the winners, but I don’t. I know I’m terrible at it. That’s why I don’t gamble. I don’t put my money where my mouth is, nor will I ever claim to. Instead, I put chicken wings where my mouth is. This weekend. While I watch what is certain to be some tantalizing NFL action.

I said last week that the Wildcard round was going to be bad, and it was. At least I didn’t—what’s the expression?—have intercourse with the dog in that regard. The only game that provided any high-drama was the Miracle at Mile High, when the ghost of Jesus—reincarnated as a gun-slinging, chapped-lipped quarterback—reigned redemption upon all of the naysayers and non-believers with an uncharacteristically accurate game-winning bomb in overtime.

“Get thee behi-yund me, Say-uh-tun!”

This weekend will probably be better. Maybe. Shit. I don’t know. Don’t listen to me.

The action gets underway Saturday with a game that will take at least 60 minutes. That much, I’m sure of.
 

New Orleans Saints @ San Francisco 49ers, 3:30PM Sat, FOX

You know the old paradox about the irresistible force and the unmovable object? Yeah, it’s that thing. And I’m betting (look out!) that I’m the ONLY “sports-blogger” who’s employed that tired, old cliché regarding this game. But I don’t care. Originality isn’t my thing—picking winners IS. Wait… DELETE! DELETE!

Anyway, Drew Brees and his super-crew of offensive wizards head to San Francisco to take on the league’s fourth best defense. That’s the headline that will be beaten to death over the next few days, and that’s to be expected. There will also be lots of side-stories about quarterback Alex Smith, the number one failure, and whether or not the Niners can win with him. I’m inclined to say no, but crazier things have happened.

No matter what happens, this will probably be worth watching. It seems unlikely that the Saints will stomp SF to death like other recent opponents, given the likes of Patrick Willis, Aldon Smith, etc., but the Saints offense is far and away more talented than anything else they’ve come across this season (with all due-respect to, um… Cleveland?).

One thing we DO know for sure: it has become apparent over the past few months that Saints coach Sean Payton is a complete ass, (if you’re a pussy who whines about teams "running up the score"), so if he’s given a chance, and things fall the Saints way, this game could end up being 86-10 in favor of New Orleans.
 

Denver Broncos @ New England Patriots, 7PM Sat, CBS

I wrote the Broncos off last week. Everyone did. The only difference is, mine is archived forever on the internet (or at least as long as Hearne keeps paying the bills) and a majority of everyone else is now countering with, “Aw, man… I could SMELL it coming. The Steelers were banged up, it was in Denver, blah blah blah, I’m a huge fucking liar, yada yada yada.” But come on… NOBODY saw Timbow pissing all over the Steelers’ staunch secondary like they were a bunch of bloodied Taliban corpses (take THAT, terrorists!) . NOBODY. And if you say you did, you’re a totally full of shit OR dangerously delusional.

So knowing what we know now—Tebow CAN throw a decent pass, should the *ahem* spirit move him—it won’t be at all shocking if he puts up 300 yards against the awful Patriots’ secondary. The Patriots’ defense is as bad as their offense is good. And that’s saying something.

And as respectable as the Broncos defense has been lately, the Patriots seem almost unstoppable, like a maple-syrup and LL Bean’d version of the Packers or the Saints. In order to hang with the Pats, it’s likely that the Tebows’ will have to put up 45 points, which they’ve done precisely never this season.

Good luck, fellas.

Houston Texans @ Baltimore Ravens, 12PM Sun, CBS

According to some, the Ravens are the sexy pick to win the Super Bowl. According to others, Houston RB Arian Foster’s “Texans” logo that he shaved into the side of his head is well-executed and completely awesome. Frankly, I don’t know that I believe either of these. What I DO know, is that the irresistible force meets the unmovable object (wait… what’s that? I already used that? Dang. Hearne—delete that, please, and come up with something really clever) when Foster and his 230 lbs of thoughtful, black muscle collide with the Ravens’ ageless, perennially terrific defense. Something’s gotta give! SUNDAY, SUNDAY, SUNDAY!

Look, like last week with the Broncos, I wrote the Texans off early. They’re missing key components on both sides of the ball, suffered from some late-season swooning and were suspect at best coming out of the punk-ass AFC South. But I was giving the Bengals too much credit last week, too. The Bengals, folks, were an utter fraud (this wasn’t exactly a revelation, but I expected a *bit* more fight from the Toothless Tigers). And much like their equine-counterpart, it would appear that the Texans are taking on a far superior team this Sunday.

The Ravens keep winning despite Joe Flacco’s mediocrity (although it’s worth noting that he’s the only QB in NFL history to reach the postseason in his first 4 yearsno thanks to him), a testament to great game-planning and that previously mentioned ageless defense. While Ray Lewis isn’t what he used to be—and not many senior citizens make great linebackers—and number’s wise, the teams are pretty even from a statistical defensive standpoint, Baltimore is full of those intangibles that analysts love, like “heart, passion, experience, determination,” and, “ability to murder without ramification.
 

New York Giants @ Green Bay Packers, 3:30PM Sun, FOX

According to others, the Giants are the other sexy pick to win the Super Bowl, Baltimore be damned.

I remain unconvinced that the Giants are anything other than a one-and-done team, and this has nothing to do with the fact that they’re playing the preseason favorite to win it all. I just… I just don’t believe in the Giants. I never have. You can’t convince me otherwise, so don’t bother trying. Maybe it’s Eli Manning’s “Cleveland Eye,” you know—one eye looking at you, the other one looking at Cleveland. (Is this why he throws so many picks, perhaps?) Maybe it’s the rushing attack of Jacobs and Bradshaw*, which, at times, seems as unstoppable as a perfectly un-slayable two-headed dragon breathing fire and shitting coal, and at others, like a wagon where the wheels never start rolling, leading to ineffective handoff after ineffective handoff.

*great law firm, by the way

The Packers, on the other hand, are exactly as they’re cracked up to be. They have no defense—they really haven’t needed it, yet—but their offense more than compensates. Aaron Rodgers could complete passes underwater that Matt Cassel couldn’t make in the backyard throwing a Nerf ball to his nephew during a family barbecue. Plus, the receivers are like every blowjob you’ve ever received; even when it’s not that great, it’s still a blowjob.

So, yeah, on the unseasonably un-frozen tundra of Lambeau Field this Sunday, the Underwater Blowjobs battle the Googly-Eyed Dragons in a battle for supremacy.

At first glance, these games look much more entertaining than last week’s general thrashings (again, with the exclusion of the Broncos/Steelers). I’m probably wrong, though. Lord knows I generally am. But you know what? I’m gonna watch anyway, and if I know you (I don’t, I promise) you’ll probably do the same.
 

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Donnelly: Sporting KC’s First Round Pick Talks About Barbecue, Some Other Stuff

All eyes were on KC Thursday morning…

Major League Soccer held its annual draft at the KC Convention Center, which was broadcast live on ESPN2

And as I predicted, Sporting KC chose a striker with their first pick in the draft, 16th overall.  They snagged Dom Dwyer, a quick, tenacious Englishman who spent last season at the University of South Florida, and the previous two years in Texas playing at Tyler Junior College.   

Will this pick live up to Peter Vermes’ growing reputation as a draft day wizard?  Certainly no one is expecting Dom to replicate CJ Sapong‘s rookie 2011 season in which the James Madison product separated himself from everyone else in his class and ripped the Rookie of the Year award by a mile.

We’ll be keeping a close eye on Dom as the season nears and reporting his progress here at KCC, but I expect him to come in and contribute on the field, probably as a backup, pretty much immediately. 

But let’s not get ahead of ourselves.  What everyone really wants to know is how a talented Englishman ended up playing at a JuCo in Texas instead of coming up with a club in Europe.  And what the newest Sporting KC first rounder thinks of Kansas City.  And if he’s been out to the stadium yet.   

And, oh yeah, whether Dom likes barbecue, right?… 

Seriously, is it a requirement whenever a sports franchise in KC drafts someone, that the draftee MUST be asked about their barbecue consumption?  I think it might be.  And has an athlete ever said, "No, I don’t really care for barbecue"?  Because in KC, that’s the equivalent of punching someone’s grandma in the face. 

I had the chance to ask Dom about all these important issues.  Did he pass the test?  You be the judge.

How’d you end up in the states instead of Europe?

I was playing with a few clubs and I got to about 16 and it was the point where you either sign pro or try and come out to America and do something else.  And I couldn’t really decide what to do, so I though let’s try America.  And I went to a company called Soccer Icon in England and they send kids over to America.  And I went to a trial in London with two of my best friends and they said you have to take the SAT test right away, but there wasn’t really time.  We weren’t really sure but we said, let’s just go for it.  So we just went for it and we ended up winning two national championships at Tyler Junior College.  And then I got recruited at USF with one of my best friends, had a great season and then this came up. 

If you had time to take the SAT where would you have chosen to go?

I was kind of interested in UCLA in a way, it always intrigued me.  They didn’t know much about me, and after junior college I spoke with them a few times and they wanted me to visit but they wouldn’t offer me a full scholarship.  So that was obviously — I had a full offer from other schools, and so I chose South Florida.  And it was obviously a great decision. 

Before the draft had you ever been in KC before?

No, but I really enjoyed it.  A shame I wasn’t here longer, I didn’t get to see much of it yet but I guess I’ll get to see it all now.

Did you get to see LIVESTRONG Sporting Park?

I have, it was unbelievable.  Everyone kept telling me how good it was and everything and I was like this is gonna be cool, this is gonna be nice.  But when I saw it, it was not what I expected.  It was way, way more.  It was unbelievable.  Just from the outside it looked cool, all the office buildings.  And the pitch, too, I’m so happy it is grass.  I didn’t realize it was grass, which I love playing on so much better than turf.  The locker room, everything, the coach, I met for a short period of time, but I already feel welcome.  And all the boys have been sending me a few messages on Twitter and making me feel welcome already.  And I’m just really excited.

Did you celebrate a little bit after being selected?

I really didn’t because I flew straight back to Tampa.  I got on the plane about – my parents left and I got on the plane about 6 after the draft, after the stadium tour.  And then I just landed in Tampa about midnight and got picked up by a few friends.  We just went home and trained with USF this morning.  I didn’t really celebrate.  It was a personal goal I’ve achieved now, but now I want to strive for even better things.  So I wouldn’t say it’s a full celebration needed, not a big celebration, because I’m not close to where I want to be yet.

You signed with Generation adidas very late, the day before the combine.  Was that a tough decision?

It really was.  It was very last minute.  At the start of the summer I was told there’s a good chance you’ll get [a Generation adidas contract].  And I was running, staying fit, getting very fit for the combine.  And the offer never came and I was like, ok, maybe it’s not going to happen.  So I was resting myself a little, didn’t want to get injured, resting my body for the college season.  And as I was about to fly back to Tampa I got a phone call with an offer.  And it was a big decision but once you kind of look it over and see how the Generation adidas is, it was an offer that was too good to turn down.  I love Florida and everything but the opportunity came, and to be drafted by Kansas City, it was unbelievable and really unexpected.  I didn’t have my best combine so I wasn’t quite pleased with that.  But the way it worked out I was really, really pleased. 

It’s worked out for the better because I’ve been drafted by a top, top team in the league, which is exciting.  I didn’t want to drop to the 2nd round and I was happy that I went in the first round to KC.  And I look back about it now and don’t think there’s any better scenario I could’ve picked.  The home crowd — I already got to see them and as soon as you get drafted the fans are chanting your name.  It makes you want to work right away and gives you that extra spring when you’re feeling tired, you want to do it for them.

How do you think you’ll fit in with Peter Vermes’ high pressure playing style? 

I like the very, very high pressure.  I feel like I can fit in any of the three positions up top.  Of course, I’m willing to play anywhere the coach wants me. 

How many times since you were drafted yesterday have you been asked about whether you like barbecue?

(Laughs.)  Quite a few times.  And I’m not really sure of my answer yet, but I’ve heard that Kansas City’s is pretty special so that’ll be something that I’ll be trying when I get there. 

If you end up not liking it, I wouldn’t tell anyone.  Kansas Citians are kind of insane about their barbecue.

No, I’ll try it.  I’m sure I’ll like it.  I do like– I’m very much into barbecue sauce and all that stuff on almost everything, so I’m sure I’ll like the barbecue food.

Good answer, Dom, you’re going to fit in just fine around here.

Posted in Sporting_Kansas_City | Tagged | 5 Comments

Hearne: And Now, the Rest of the ‘Uncle Ed Muscari’ Story

This isn’t the first report on the death of former Channel 41 late night personality Uncle Ed Muscare...

However, in the interest of adding a bit of corrective information along with some news and views to the mix of mostly blogger driven reporting and commentary, let’s take another look. The New York native died in a Florida prison Sunday at the age of 79.

"He was creepy, the creepiest," says former Shawnee Counciwoman Tracy Thomas. "He was a cross between Ed Wood and a defrocked priest."

"I met him a couple times," says longtime radio personality and movie dude Jack Poessiger. "He was an entertaining guy at a time when late night ntelevision still had local programming and it became a local phenomenon. And when he left, his show got taken over by by Dick Wilson of KCMO FM."

Contrary to reports that Muscare’s "All Night Live" show ran in the 1970s, it was on for four years from 1981 to 1985, according to a fan who chronicled his passing recently on YouTube.

Muscare’s schtick – incidentally he went by Muscari while on TV in KC – was to engage is a bizarre series of skits in between scarey movies, Three Stooges shorts and the like.

"The most popular that I remember was his bananna phone," Poessiger recalls. "You’d hear the phone ring and he’d grab a bannana and take the call. And he kept a cat in a chest of drawers or his desk drawer. His whole approach was he was very much on the edge – very out there – and a lot of college kids would watch the show, which was very dark.

"He also had viewers make a secret pledge to his show. Like you belonged to his club and his weirdness. I used to watch it every so often because it was hip, funny and totally off-center compared to what anyone else was doing on TV at the time."

Muscare’s crime – allegedly fondling an underage youth – went down in the 80s when he "pleaded no contest in Orange County to a 1987 sexual battery of a boy," the Orlando Sentinel reports. "He served a prison term and was placed on a 10-year probation, but the term was extended twice because of subsequent violations. In 1998 he failed to comply with sex-offender-registration requirements when he lived in Lady Lake and he later moved to South Carolina without notifying authorities"

Which resulted in Muscare being busted again and ordered not to post anymore YouTube videos under the name edarem, for which he became popular with "more than 7 million views and legions of followers," the Post reports.

One such video in 2009 entitled "Pretty Woman," garnered more than 1.6 milllion views. It features a frazzle-haired Muscare lip synching and grooving in a creepy manner to the Roy Orbison classic while doing a mini, faux strip tease, removing his sweater and unbuttoning one of his shirt buttons.

In another strange video two years ago, "How I quit Smoking," Muscare tells viewers to replace the cigarette pack in their shirt pockets with sunflower seeds and eat them instead. Muscare reportedly died of lung cancer.

His, uh, significant other – a woman by the name of Marion Kolehmainen – posted a YouTube announcement of Muscare’s death Monday in which she said, "I have so much I want to share with you and so much I don’t know if I should share with you.

"Edward’s okay. I know some of you don’t believe in the afterlife, but believe me, he’s doing okay. He left me with all of his love and I’m okay, too. I really am…Ed’s at home now; he’s with the angels."

She told the Post, "He made his life, his career being the center of attention. There are some people that all they can focus on is his charge back in the 80s. I don’t want people to judge him for what happened. He’s sorry for it. He’s a good man. That’s what I want people to remember."

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | Tagged | 24 Comments

Hearne: Westport Nightclub Nabob Declares War on Kansas City Liquor Law

All’s fair in love and Card Wars…

For years Westport businessman Bill Nigro has waged a war of words against a pair of cards Kansas City has required workers in the service industry – bars and restaurants – to purchase and carry. Nigro polished one off – the health department’s "food handler" card – last month and as of this year, they are no longer required.

The so-called "health card" cost 20 bucks and required workers who handle food to take classes on hand washing and the like.

That leaves one last card on Nigro’s hit list, Kansas City Regulated Industries "liquor card."

"This is something that’s been debated on the council at length," says Regulated Industries head Gary Majors. "And we did systematically go through a lot of the regulations and modified some of them that didn’t make any sense – actually, a lot of ’em.

"As far as the liquor cards, that was one of two things that was hotly debated and the Public Safety Neighborhoods Committee decided (we) should keep them – that was the first time. The second time the law was changed and we came up with ordinance changes."

Ordinance changes to rules that banned convicted felons from working in the liquor biz. Ordinances that were struck down with the exception of murder, rape and sexual abuse of a child, Majors says.

"That was a hotly debated process and many of the council didn’t want to relax our restrictions at all," Majors says. "They wanted to keep all felons out, but the council approved it."

So twice in four years the liquor cards were discussed and debated, Majors says.

Persons working in the alcohol selling and serving biz are required to apply for the card by submitting their personal information to Regulated Industries (at a cost of $13 a year). Regulated Industries then processes that information and gives them a green light. Or doesn’t.

"What’s the purpose of the card?" Nigro counters. "To save me from hiring bad guys? We don’t need 10 people at Regulated Industries to pull money out of poor people to make cards. It’s just a way for the city to make money and they’re having a tough time admitting that."

The problem, Nigro says, is that minimum wage workers have a tough time with coming up with the cash – $40 up front for three years – and dragging down to out-of-the-way parts of the city to apply for the cards.

"I’m not saying it’s not tough on people just getting started," Majors says. "But I don’t think it prevents nearly the number of people (Nigro thinks it does) from getting a job. My opinion is, there’s some real value there, in more than one way."

Majors says he thinks it keeps bad guys out of the industry, but Nigro says, "We can police ourselves," Majors says. "We’ve given Bill a lot of what he’s asked for, but we disagree on some things."

"It’s a meaningless card," Nigro says. "I use them to pick door locks, that’s what I use mine for. I hope they can read it when they come in to check mine."

Which brings us to Nigro’s second gripe about the liquor cards.

And that’s that Regulated Industries and police come into bars and restaurants on busy nights and hassle workers at the worst possible time to make sure they have their liquor cards on them. And if they don’t, they send them home leaving the businesses short-handed.

"That’s not true," Majors says. "All they have to do is the business owners make a copy of the cards and keep them on file. Or we take the person’s name (who doesn’t have a card) and get back to them later. Then if they don’t have a card, we tell the business they can’t serve liquor and they can’t be a bouncer."

Hold it right there, Nigro says.

"They say they don’t send you home? How many bartenders do you want me to have call you to tell you they’ve sent people home? Maybe this is something new they’re doing because we’ve complained."

Nigro’s bottom line on the liquor cards:

"It’s a bigger insult than the health card, because at least with the health card they teach you how to wash your hands and keep warm things warm and cold things cold. They’ve used the liquor cards in the past to shake us down.

"They shove these cards down the throats of people who can’t afford them. They’re roadblocks to people trying to get jobs. I think it’s nonsense and that’s why I call them dumb cards. Half my employees don’t have cars and they have to find a way to get to 7th and Woodland to go get a card. It prevents owners from being able to conduct business."

Nigro’s New Year’s Resolution: to do to KC’s liquor cards the same thing he did last year to the city’s health cards.

The battle lines are drawn…

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | Tagged | 24 Comments

Glazer: Scribe Straps on His Protective Cup & Plunges Ahead into NFL Playoffs

Vegas seems to have no problem with this year’s NFL playoffs picture, PACKERS ALL THE WAY…

Yep, unlike you and I they see no problems. Green Bay is almost even money – 1 1/2 to 1 to win it all again. But clearly many people now like the Saints and they are 3 1/2 to 1 with New England the second best pick at 2 1/2 to 1.

We all know the Pack and the Pats have very poor defenses and Saints are maybe average.

So why are the Saints not favored?

Simple. On the road at Green Bay, the grass, the cold, playing outdoors, all make for a tougher road to get to the Super Bowl than New England will battle. That’s the Vegas thinking. Me, I was on the Packers all the way last year and this.

But yeah, the Saints and Giants do scare even me!

The Packers need to find that D.

These look to be some of the most interesting playoff games in years. Maybe it always feels that way, huh?

By the way Denver is still a long shot – a very long at 35 to 1 – to win it all. And the Texans are 25 to 1, the Giants 12-1, the Niners 12-1 and the Ravens are 61/2 to 1.

Hey, if I were in the sports book room today, I’d throw a couple hundred on those two or three long shots….could happen.

But as of today I am sticking with the Packers and New England. If the Saints smash the 49ers and Pack just gets by Giants, I may have to take a closer look at next week’s championships, but here we go. These are tough calls, by the way.

Doesn’t it bother you, for example,  that the BIG TIME SAINTS are only a 3 1/2 point favorite over San Fran? Is this a trap game? I say No! I don’t like the 49ers offense.

Saints -3 1/2 over the San Fran 49ers

New England -7 over Denver (tease bet w/ Houston)

Houston 14 1/2 over Baltimore( this is part two of New England tease adding 6 to each)

New York Giants 14 1/2 over the Packers (tease with Saints)

Saints 2 1/2
over San Fran..on a tease(with Giants game)

Posted in Craig_Glazer | Tagged | 26 Comments

Glazer: Scribe Stamps Seal of Approval on New 38 the Spot Hottie Crystle Lampitt

Good news Kansas City…

At long last we have a new, smoking hot babe to replace Holly Starr on 38 THE SPOT. I’ve seen her and I can assure you she’s gonna get some major, citywide play.

Since Holly got married and had a kid, Jack FM personality Nycki Pace has been filling in and doing a great job. Nycki’s been on the air since September, but her job at 38 THE SPOT as spokesmodel ends tomorrow. As many of you already know she’s the wife of Q104 host, Mike Kennedy.

So who is the new "It Grrrl" in town?

Her name is Crystle Lampitt and man, oh man, what a beauty! Move over Penelope Cruz. Or as Jim Carey might say, SMOKIN!

38’s endlessly long talent search totally paid off. Crystle was born in Cairo, Egypt and spent her childhood in Indonesia. She moved to KC with her family in 2000 and has been in the entertainment racket ever since. She’s modeled and appeared in international ad campaigns, TV commercials and print.

And get this, she studied film and media at KU and graduated with honors in 2009.

In addition to her entertainment work, Crystle even found time to teach pre-school in Sydney, Australia.

KC will now have a stand out hottie to brag about. One that’s in the news, on TV and on the scene.

From the Midwestern, girl-next-door beauty, Holly Starr to the exotic-looking Crystle – great work 38 THE SPOT!

This lady will light it up for everyone.

PS: Crystle, I’m still single and at KSHB and 38 THE SPOT all the time…let’s get together.

Posted in Craig_Glazer | Tagged | 23 Comments

Hearne: Groundskeeper Hall of Famer George Toma’s Greatest Hit Jobs

They say it’s lonely at the top…

That’s likely to be the case with KC Sultan of Sod George Toma and the new "MLB Groundskeeper Hall of Fame. " I couldn’t resist poking a little fun at the hall yesterday, but silly as the concept seems, there’s no doubt Toma is deserving of the props.

That said, it’s hard to imagine Toma’s new award and the "hall" bringing much of any import to the table in the years to come. Now that it’s shot it proverbial wad on about the only groundskeeper anybodys ever heard of in the grass growing game. Quick, tell me who’s next? 

Now let’s review what made Toma so special – I’m talking about his chutzpah.

Toma was good enough at his game and old school enough to speak out even when it wasn’t in his best interests to do so. Which probably explains why he’s still doing his post retirement thing for the Super Bowl and the Minnesota Twins and not the Royals or the Chiefs.

Let’s start with Kansas City Library honcho Crosby Kemper III‘s successful effort to install real grass in Kauffman Stadium in the early 90s. An effort Kemper launched and waged in my column in the Kansas City Star.

""I plan to call it the Ad Hoc Commission for the Full Employment of George Toma," Kemper told me in 1993. "(Toma has) an international reputation, and I think we ought to spotlight it. Especially since the team isn’t doing so well, we’ve got to find what assets we can. "

Has it been that long since the Royals sucked? And were so bad that the team’s playing surface became a cause celebre?

Toma weighed in on Kemper’s side, despite the fact that the dude signing his paychecks, Herk Robinson, was dead set against getting rid of the artificial turf.

Toma could have kept it in his pants, cashed his paychecks and left Kemper to duke it out with the former Royals GM ,but he didn’t.

"Rain shouldn’t be a problem for real grass, because drainage systems are better now than before," Toma said. "And the expense should be about the same in the long run.

Which side were the players on, I asked. "I know they’re pulling for natural grass," Toma said.

There you have it; Toma was a rebel.

Take the time he dissed former Royals owner Ewing Kauffman‘s daughter Julia, the local heiress nobody – and I mean, nobody – in KC messes with.

"Julia and I had our moments," Toma wrote in is book Nitty Gritty Dirt Man. "The Yankees were in town for the playoffs, and before the game I was chatting with Reggie Jackson behind the plate. Now Reggie and I had known each other since he signed with the (Kansas City) A’s and played at Municipal Stadium. But Julia saw me, ran to Herk Robinson and said, `Hey, you have to fire George Toma. He’s talking with the enemy.’ Some people just don’t understand sports, I guess."

Or the time four years back when he ripped Carl Peterson‘s Kansas City Chiefs after an NFL Player Association poll dissing the turf at Arrowhead.

 "I think they have to become groundskeepers again — I’m not ripping them — but right now they’re caretakers," Toma told me. "They know if a field goes bad they can re-sod it, but they’re not getting good sod. How can anybody re-sod two times in one week? I’d be embarrassed if I had to re-sod twice in one week."

Kansas City had one of the four worst fields in the NFL, Toma said.

"It hurts me," he said. "I have a saying: ‘Do the job and then some.’ And the ‘and then some’ distinguishes the mediocre from the great…I think they’re going to have to change something. They’ve lost something, but I can’t put my finger on it."

Where is the hall gonna find another groundskeeper who’s had skin in the game for 70 years? With Toma’s credentials and anything even approaching his record for speaking his mind, regardless of risk?

Yep, could get pretty lonely in that Groundskeeper Hall of Fame…

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | Tagged | 5 Comments

Jack Goes Confidential: Meryl Streep Makes Believer Out Of ‘IRON LADY’

Need more proof as to Meryl Streep‘s status as our finest working film actress?

Look no further than her riviting and flawless performance as British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher.

In THE IRON LADY we flash back from her now dementia impaired living status to a career that had made her the most famous and influential woman of the 20th Century. An 11 year long political reign of running the British government that began in 1979 and ended in 1990.

And even further back to her humble origins as the daughter of a local grocer.

But there’s something quite unusual here. The film itself is good. Yet Meryl Streep’s performance and portrayal of Thatcher far exceeds it.

When she becomes the nation’s tough commander leading England into the Falklands War, there’s no doubt in your mind that Streep is Margaret Thatcher.

Matter of fact, I accepted Streep as the character she portrays from the first scenes—something that normally takes me at least 10 to 15 minutes into a film depicting a still living major international personality.

THE IRON LADY is a motion picture of contrasting images of Britain’s first ever female prime minister, who was also a mother. And in many ways it could be defined as an intimate personal portrait as she now deals almost daily with her husband Denis Thatcher—who had actually died 8 years earlier. He’s wonderfully portrayed by Jim Broadbent.

The bottom line: There may be a bit too much flashing back and forth for my taste, but THE IRON LADY is definitely worth seeing by the serious moviegoer.

Sometimes I approach my personal rating of a movie from two perspectives;  as the total film experience and from the standpoint of a specific leading performance.

That’s the case with THE IRON LADY.

3-1/2 OUT OF 5 fingers for the film, but 5 fingers in response to Ms. Streep’s Oscar worthy performance.

She WILL be nominated for the top prize on January 24th. Count on it.

JACK GOES TO THE MOVIES Friday mornings at 6:40 a.m. on NewsRadio KMBZ AM & FM and at 8:20 a.m. on 1660 RADIO BACH. Also anytime on Time-Warner Cable’s K.C. ON DEMAND, Channel 411.

Posted in Jack_Poessiger | Tagged | 9 Comments

Leftridge: TV Time: Hell on Wheels Makes the Most of Racial Epithets, Violence & Whore Talk

If you’re easily offended by the gratuitous use of racial epithets, lots of hot whore talk, or violence perpetuated with frightful indifference, Hell on Wheels may not be the show for you. If, however, you’re cool with “injun,” and the occasional n-bomb, find nothing indecent about tattooed-faced ladies of the night sleeping with black men and you think it’s cool to watch dudes get shot in the mouth at close range (the smoke seeping out of his mouth as he lay dying was a particularly devilish touch), then climb aboard AMC’s gritty offering about burgeoning life in a brave new world.

Though Hell on Wheels is about the westward expansion of the Transcontinental railroad in 1865, that’s only a small part of the wide picture the program is meant to paint.

First and foremost, it’s the tale of Cullen Bohannon (Anson Mount), a former Confederate soldier bad-ass heading out West to track down the Union soldiers who murdered his wife. Along the way, he demonstrates an awkward brand of flirting with the sexy British chick (Dominique McElligott ) whose husband was plotting a path through the Rockies, saves a recently freed slave (Common) from an unwarranted hanging and butts heads with both his boss (Colm Meany) and the railroad camp’s head of security (Christopher Heyerdahl), a terrifying man with a penchant for violence known simply as “the Swede.”
 

The Swede was two minutes away from killing Bohannon in the first few hours of the show.

The Swede stuck a fork in a man’s face in a recent episode.

Swede is way bad.
 

In addition to the Swede, Hell on Wheels features a cast of compelling recurring characters who provide a rich depth to the proceedings.

The kind-hearted preacher (Tom Noonan) who abandoned his daughter in a previous life. The former savage (Eddie Spears) who found Christ under the tutelage of the preacher. The McGinnes brothers (Ben Esler and Phil Burke), Irish lads hoping to find their fortune by showing slideshows for a pittance.

The greatest talent, however, is in the primary cast.
 

Common—the civic-minded rapper who is popular with white, backpacking crowds of hip-hop fans and real black guys alike—is a revelation as Elam, a former slave who finds himself as Bohannon’s “cut-boss,” in charge of the other black workers. He fills his screen-time with extraordinary passion and believability. (That’s why I was a little freaked out when, after a recent episode, they debuted one of his new music videos. Suddenly, there was the calculated, passionate Elam in a tuxedo, dancing and rapping at some swanky party. That was… weird, AMC.)

Colm Meany
is brilliant as Thomas “Doc” Durant, the egocentric, driven, utterly selfish tycoon in charge of the project. Best known for his roles on the Star Treks, (Next Generation and Deep Space Nine), I finally figured out why I thought I knew him: he could play Albert Brooks if they ever made the movie "Albert Brooks: Being Albert Brooks". Dead ringer. His character—who made his fortune by taking any available opportunity, ethically sound, or not—is an almost-perfect villain. He’s compelling, and when he appears on the screen, you find yourself torn between punching your television and staring intently.

The real star of the lot is Anson Adams Mount IV, a real life southerner (fun fact: and real descendent of a confederate soldier, too!) who plays the protagonist. Though his words are few, their impact is bountiful, and Mount—who’s been in a lot, but probably nothing you’ve seen—delivers it all with an Eastwood-like cold-bloodedness. He’s handsome, though not distractingly so, and has enough of an occasional smirk that he’s not completely boring.

It’ll be interesting to see where this role leads, as he’s so perfect as Bohannon, it’s almost impossible to see him playing anything other than a murderous, outlaw frontiersman with a heart of… well, at least copper (gold’s stretching it… dude shoots and kills a lot of people).
 

 In reality, and with all flowery, grand allusions aside, this is simply a good old-fashioned western, beautifully shot and with just the right amount of drama and violence. The Indians are terrifying– as they should be– people are drinking constantly at all hours of the day, and there’s enough racial tension between the Irish and the blacks and the blacks and the Americans that the viewer demands that things keep going.

Hell on Wheels was recently picked up for a second season, and we’re all lucky to be in on the ground floor.
 

And if you haven’t seen an episode yet? Just check AMC. That channel runs so many marathons of their original programming, it’s like you’d think they were proud of it, or something.
 

Sundays, AMC, 9pm CT. 
 

Posted in Entertainment | Tagged | 18 Comments

Today: The Strange Ascension of George Toma into Even an Stranger Hall of Fame

Before this column spirals out of control. allow me to say a few kind words about George Toma...

Without question the longtime Kansas City A’s, Chiefs and Royals groundskeeper was the gold standard among groundskeepers in Major League Baseball and the National Football League. The 80-something Toma started as groundskeeper for major league baseball in Kansas City in 1957, when the Athletics were playing at Municipal Stadium at 22nd Street and Brooklyn Avenue.

Toma’s also renown for his decades of duty tending to Super Bowl fields and sporting events worldwide.

So it comes as little surprise that in a sports short in today’s Star we learn he’s been inducted into the Major League Baseball Groundskeeper Hall of Fame.

Hold it right there…

The Major League Baseball Groundskeeper Hall of Fame – who’s ever heard of that?

"I tell ya, I’ve never heard of it before," says MLB communications head Mike Teevan. "I don’t think officially it’s a part of Major League Baseball."

Naturally, the Star skipped over that tiny detail, leaving to reader’s imagination whether such a stately pleasure dome actually exists, housing marble busts and bronze statues of grass growers past and present astride lawnmowers from days gone by.

And frankly, outside of Toma, who really ever heard of sod sultans such as deceased Milwaukee Brewers groundskeeper Gary VandenBerg, for whom Toma’s trophy was named?

Incidentally VanderBerg, who died in October at age 59, only started with the Brewers in 1981, 24 years into Toma’s career in KC. Aside from being "beloved" in Milwaukee and winning several awards, VandenBerg’s bio pales in comparison to Toma’s.

After reading VandenBerg’s eulogies, it’s clear the award should bear Toma’s name if anyone’s.

So yes, it’s most excellent that Toma was awarded this distinction. But it should also have been noted in the reporting that prior to his selection, there was no groundskeeper hall of fame and that he and the dude who were installed this week are the one and only people in this yet brand new, if imaginary HOF.

And to be fair, that Toma was selected by a small, self-appointed committee of five baseball execs, two of whom are members of the Kansas City Royals organization.

It’s also worth noting that outside of players, managers, baseball executives and umpires, there are no inductees in the National Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown, New York. That according to NBHOF communications director Craig Muder.

"There are awards winner," Muder says. "But they are not inductees."

None of whom are groundskeeper, btw.

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | Tagged | 14 Comments

Glazer: New Hollywood Casino at Kansas Speedway Could be a Grand Slam

With the coming opening of Hollywood Casino at Kansas Speedway next to Legends, what are we to think?

Will this be the perfect storm? A Casino that actually brings people to shop and be entertained in the surrounding area? The ones that opened in the early 90’s in Missouri did the exact opposite.

The casinos that opened here in the middle of nowhere took a toll on our entertainment districts, Westport and the Plaza. You don’t hear much about that anymore, but it’s true. The advent of the urban, hip-hop, rap generation movement added to that decline, but it all started with Kansas City’s love affair with gambling 20 years ago.

Maybe you’ve forgotten, but had to BUY a ticket to get on the BOATS. Then you had SHIFTS and had to leave, or buy another pass to get back on. One casino had two boats. Which one should you get on?

It was wild, it was exciting and it nearly destroyed our local restaurants and bars for five years.

The casino’s even offered AFTER HOURS COCKTAILS.

For a time they served until 5 AM. All of that nonsense ended by 1997. In fact today you don’t need a card to get on and there are no limits – it’s VEGAS STYLE gaming today. Yet after 20 years the attendance is way, way down at Kansas City’s Casinos.

Remember when the Star used to print those pie charts showing which casino was doing the most biz?

A poor economy combined with the "it ain’t new anymore" took a toll. One major casino – Sam’s Town – went bust. A couple others have sold and had name changes. There are no "boats" anymore and you don’t have to be by the water.

Kinda like weed. Before long it will be legal and what will they tell all those 50-60 year olds who did prison time for having a bag of pot in the car back in the 60s, 70s or 80s? That the government really cares about you, your health and welfare? Uh, not really – they never did. It’s a BUSINESS.

The Hollywood Casino, due to open February 3rd, may be a horse of a different color.

First off it’s one of the few casinos located by a large shopping area with a decent population nearby.

Unlike most others in the middle of nowhere. It reminds me of the one in Hollywood Florida by the Hard Rock or in it actually. It does very well – lots of tourists and traffic – and the mall next door does well too.

And this may be the case here.

The depression, I’m sorry recession, stopped several big companies including Red Development, who owns or did own most of Legends, from wanting a casino. Remember the bidding wars on this puppy in 2006 and 2007?

They ended up with one buyer. Also the Hollywood casino is next to several EVENT stadiums and that will help. It may actually bring people out to Legends to eat, shop and have early entertainment like at our comedy club. Dinner, a show and gambling – all in a close area. It makes sense.

The bloom is off the rose for seeing yet another Vegas style casino, but people that live out this way were kinda far from Harrah’s and the other casinos, so this might bring more locals out more often.

This place could hit the JACKPOT!

It could be really busy and help the city of KCK and add to the attendance at Legends. They have no showroom or hotel yet and who knows if they ever will? They will have a few restaurants, but most likely most people will eat at the more stable restaurants nearby.

Time will tell.

But you have to hand it to KCK, Village West and Legends for becoming a centerpiece of Kansas City entertainment. They offer it all now, family, teenage and adult entertainment. A one stop shop.

Could be a real boon for the area.

Posted in Craig_Glazer | Tagged | 43 Comments

Hearne: Crawfish ‘Shortage’ – Real or Imagined – Grips Local Cajun Eatery Jazz

Don’t look now, but there’s an imaginary crawdaddy drought going down…

For three long weeks a crawfish shortage has gripped KC’s top cajun restaurant chain, Jazz a Louisiana Kitchen. That according to a server Monday at the eatery’s 39th and State Line location. Which, of course, flew in the face of the restaurant’s Mudbug Mondays special, "2 Pounds of Crawfish and 2 Pints Select Draft Beer" for $14.99.

There were none to be had my server said.

What? No crawdaddies at an eatery who’s very logo is – you guessed it – cartoon crawdaddies!

"I actually don’t know why we haven’t been able to get them," Jazz staffer Jane said in a followup call Tuesday. "I assume because they’re not in season or something. I’ll have to ask my manager, but he’s not here. We haven’t been able to get them for a while, but I have no idea why. Sorry."

Ditto for the Jazz location at the Legends in KCK.

"It’s our food distributor that’s been out," Jazz staffer Andy said. "It’ll probably be a little bit longer, probably a few more weeks."

While an extended crawfish shortage in Kansas City may seem unthinkable, take heart; Joe’s Crab Shack in Olathe says it’s experienced no such shortage. Come and get ’em.

"We have ’em," says Joe’s manager Ed Shaw. "We don’t have any problem getting them. I have not heard anything about a shortage, but sometimes a vendor will buy in bulk and they just can’t get them."

Upon further investigative reporting I learned local seafood wholesalers Seattle Fish and Fabulous Fish Co. also say they have crawfish in stock.

"I don’t think there’s necessarily a shortage," Seattle’s Zack Zachott said. "I’ve got some. It’s just a tricky business."

Not familiar with crayfish as a food group? Read on.

According to chacha.com, "Crayfish, crawfish, or crawdads are freshwater crustaceans resembling small lobsters, to which they are related. They breathe through feather-like gills and they are mostly found in brooks and streams where there is fresh water running."

Get it? Little lobster thingies.

They’re raised and shipped year round by organizations like Kyle LeBlanc Crawfish Farms in Raceland, Louisiana.

"They can’t get ’em?" LeBlanc asked. "They can get ’em from me."

That’s cool, but is there some sort of seasonal shortage or something going down?

"No, not really," LeBlanc says. "I ship 10 months out of the year and I’ve got ’em right now."

As it happens, KC Confidential Web meister Lazarus Potter was hanging at Jazz Monday night also.

Was Laz bummed about the crawdaddy shortage?

"Nope, I hate to say it but I never order crawfish," he says. "And I especially would never order crawfish in Kansas City."

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | Tagged | 17 Comments

Sounds Good: Jason & the Scorchers@Knuckleheads, A Lull@Replay, ACB’s@Jackpot, The Civil Wars@Liberty Hall

 

Let’s knock the holiday crust off our pasty, shriveled and malnourished bodies…

Gone are the pseudo-memories from another disgusting New Year’s Eve.  Do you really want to know what you said to that girl at the bar?  Or what you said about your sister’s douche boyfriend? 

No, you do not.

Were couches peed on?  Maybe they were, maybe they weren’t.  Does it even matter anymore? 

Packed away are the "great gifts" you received.  And by "packed away" I mean either Goodwill or straight down the gullet.  And by "great gifts" I basically mean booze.

Let’s put all that nonsense behind us and get back to our normal kick-ass lives – the ones where we pay a few bucks to get lost for a few hours…

 

Wednesday, January 11th
 

Jason and the Scorchers at Knuckleheads in KC

 They bill themselves as “relentless rock ’n’ twang since 1981,” but that’s really only partly true.  After laying low for the better part of the last decade, this alt-country blazing act put out an album in 2010 called Halcyon Times, and has been touring in support of it since.  The album’s pretty good and is vintage Scorchers.  And despite a few new band members, the Scorchers can still do it in a big, gritty, filthy way – not a tribute band way. 

Make no mistake, these guys are/were critical darlings that get credited with influencing a whole helluva lot of genres and styles.  Like the whole cover-song-but-do-it-punk-style thing, for example.  The Scorchers’ mid-eighties take on Dylan’s Absolutely Sweet Marie figured that whole deal out for everyone.  And the alt-country thing – yep, that’s Jason and his boys again.   

Here’s the most recent set list I could find, which was from a show in Amsterdam: 

Mona Lee

Shop It Around

Absolutely Sweet Marie

Last Time Around

Land Of The Free

I Can’t Help Myself

Drugstore Truck Drivin’ Man

I’m Sticking With You

Twang Town Blues

Pray For Me, Mama (I’m A Gypsy Now)

Harvest Moon

Better Than This

Broken Whiskey Glass

Moonshine Guy/Releasing Celtic Prisoners

Encore:

Help There’s A Fire

White Lies 

 

Thursday, January 12th
 

A Lull at the Replay in Lawrence
 

This young Chicago band plays a super-percussive brand of indie rock, complete with digital bleeps and treeps.  But their lyrics fit more into the singer-songwriter deal, which makes A Lull somewhat off kilter at times.  Sometimes so much so that you could call their sound a bit “messy,” and trying to wade through the multiple layers of sounds and effects and reverb and percussion might not be worth it for the faint of heart.  But they do have awesome lyrics like “All we know are each other’s holes,” a line taken from the song, Mammals

Their latest album, Confetti, has received some attention from critics, but overall has received mostly hum drum reviews.  As Pitchfork’s David Bevan put it, “While it’s clear a lot the textures here have been calibrated just so, the aggressive manner in which this crew opted to produce the record makes for a flat, synthetic sheen that takes a lot away from the multi-dimensional sound multiple drummers can provide.”

But hey, for an indie band like this, a lukewarm Pitchfork review is probably better than a good one from most other outlets.  I have a feeling this show could be interesting.   

 

Saturday, January 14th
 

The ACB’s & the Kinetiks at the Jackpot Music Hall in Lawrence
 

For those of you still in the dark when it comes to the ACB’s latest album, Stona Rosa, get your shit together.  Go here (http://theacbs.bandcamp.com/) right now and listen to the seventh track, My Face.  Then listen to the whole album and see if you can get those songs out of your head.  I’ll give you a hint: you can’t.  But if you can, then you are probably a robot. 

If I was into the whole list thingy like so many music critics are, I would’ve pegged Stona as the best local album of 2011.  Hell, I might have put it pretty high on my “all albums list,” not just local.  If I was into lists, that is, which I am not.  Partly because I don’t have that much time.  I’d rather get out from behind my screen every now and again and get beer spilled on me at the Jackpot and watch these guys this Saturday. 

But wait!  Act now and you also get the Kinetiks, an indie dance-rock band from Lawrence that features half and half boys and half girls.  Their songs are polished little pop numbers that usually have some sort of nerd twist to them.  They caught the attention of former Sublime producer, Stuart Sullivan, who agreed to record their last album, Science is Magic, in his Austin studio.

 

Tuesday, January 17th

 
The Civil Wars at Liberty Hall in Lawrence

This should be an intimate little affair, with a band that’s been gaining a ton of momentum lately.  As you will recall, inquisitive concert-goers, a few months ago I recommended The Civil Wars when they were virtual unknowns rolling from town to town in their old white van.  They stopped at the Bottleneck and wooed the audience with their folk harmonies and storytelling songs, promising to return soon. 

Well since then they’ve received a pretty big shot in the arm from none other than Adele.  (You know Adele, right?  Her latest album, 21, went 14 times platinum in the UK.  She’s the first artist ever to sell more than 3 million copies of an album in one year in the UK.  She’s been nominated for 6 Grammys.  You can’t go anywhere without hearing her song, Rolling in the Deep, to the extent that if you hear it again you might want to stab your ears out.  Get up to speed, yo.)  Anyway…
 
After the Civil Wars opened for Adele’s North American tour, the sultry Brit singer blogged that they were her favorite band around and that everyone should go see them.  Since then it’s been success after success for the Tennessee duo of Joy Williams and John Paul White.  They’ve played the Grand Ole Opry at the Ryman Auditorium where they were introduced by Emmylou Harris, were nominated for a Grammy in the folk album category, and were mentioned on, like, everyone’s best of 2011 lists, from NPR to Paste to the HuffPo.

Posted in Entertainment | Tagged | 8 Comments

Star Search: Month-Old Rehash of Report Masquerades as News in Star

Better late than never, I suppose…

That’s one way to look at yesterday’s front-page, upper right-hand story in the Star by Mike Hendricks.

"Drug of Choice For Kids Is Pot," reads the headline. "Use of alcohol and tobacco drops, but high school seniors’ daily marijuana use hits a 30-year peak."

However the story – masquerading as breaking news – was little more than a ginned up rehash of a month-old report widely covered by other news media around the country early last month.

For example, "Teen drinking, smoking continue to decline, but pot use is up," reads a Los Angeles Times headline covering the same report cited by Hendricks.

The key difference being the Times story ran in a timely manner on December 15th.

The day after the report was released.

Hendricks localized the story somewhat by dressing it up with quotes from local educators, a couple unnamed colleges kids and a bit of "social media" by touching on a little known group called "Show Me Cannabis Regulation" with a Facebook page with only 2,554 "likes".

The fact remaining that what the Star trotted out as front page news – that teens are smoking more potwasmonth old news.

A story that had been reported weeks ago by dozens of newspapers, television stations and bloggers – everyone from the Washington Post, Time Magazine and Fox News to the Huffinton Post, Christian Science Monitor and Kalamazoo Gazette.

The question being, why should Kansas Citians pay to read month old news stories and be last to know?

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | Tagged | 17 Comments

Glazer: Scribe Screwed by Insurance Company in Brother’s Death

As many of you may know, my younger brother Jack was killed in an car accident in late October…

Jack’s car went off the highway at 9:10 PM on his way home from work. The toxicology report was negative; no drugs or alcohol was found in his system.

Jack had no life insurance, but he did have insurance for health and auto. I know many of you have never experienced this kind of situation, but we all are forced to face a family death at some point. Jack’s insurance companies did have "death benefits and medical payments" in their other policies. That’s something we all should consider, because Jack’s funeral was a bit higher than most because we had to buy a plot and so forth.

We contacted all the insurance companies – none of them called us about any monies due. And as we investigated, we found that three would pay a few thousand each if we sent them several items like a death certificate, a county court clearance saying we were his immediate family and some other items that take weeks to get.

All of which really did little more than delay the payment to the family.

We had Jack’s will and proof of death from the police, the funeral home, paperwork from the accident, the Jackson County Corners office and on and on.

But that wasn’t good enough.

Many of the people I spoke to on the phone knew who I was and most of them were located right here in KC. They all said, "We’re so sorry, we want to help you. If there’s anything else we can do, just call."

Yeah, right.

Many of them meant what they said, but were handcuffed by their company’s policies. Which is not a good thing for you or me.

When we are late with payments, we are turned into the wonderful credit bureau.

Then they destroy you with great care and no compassion. Even if you are in the right, GOOD LUCK. It’s, "Oh please send a letter….it will take 60-90 days…then we’ll review the papers…"

Translation: if a mistake against you is made, it may take months to get it off your record, even with a court order. I know, it’s happened to me twice in 20 years.

Most of our credit history in the three main bureau’s have goes back decades. In my case, like most of you guys, it’s gold, with all payments on time back to the 80’s. But I had two derogatory reports on paying off a hotel bill and a loan years ago. I won both in court, but it took years to get them off all three reporting agencies.

Wells Fargo had the loan on my car – one of two they held – and my brother was driving one of my cars when he was killed.

They were so sorry, they said. We’ve got your back, they said.

They did pay off most of the balance of $7,900 still owed on the car – all but about 400 bucks. No problem. I had GAP insurance and they would pay the rest.

Wells Fargo said we were good, I didn’t need to make anymore payments even though I still owed the $390.

"No problem," they told me. "You don’t need to pay that – we’ll get it from GAP – we’re in contact with them." 

I never got a letter or a call at work. I offered to pay the difference because was worried it might be considered a late payment. They told me not to.

Next thing I know, a couple weeks back my credit report showed A NEW  DEROGATORY COMMENT, FAILURE TO PAY OFF WELLS FARGO.

I was pissed.

I spent three hours on the phone trying to find a real person who could do anything at Wells Fargo. Finally I got an executive, she listened and agreed that I had been screwed.

I agreed to pay off the balance and they could pay me the GAP money when it came. They kinda liked that and told me I could pay over phone which I did. Now I’m still waiting for it come off my credit score and to get the email confirmation and letter they promised saying that they made a mistake.

What a nightmare and it’s still going on.

It hurt my home loan from being lowered…great…thanks.

Blue Cross, in a way, is just as bad. You’d think in death cases they all would be a little nice and try a bit harder, but NO. They hang onto your money as long as they can.

P.S. Geico, who was a back up insurance company, sent a check in five days from the call. We had the least money in them, and they questioned almost nothing. With just the funeral paperwork and police report they paid a couple grand in less than a week – best of all.

I could go on with Farmers headaches, but you get the picture. I’m sure all this is done to most people – how awful. Death is bad enough, but now I’m fighting a credit battle for no reason. I haven’t even received most of any money owed for the death benefits.

That’s probably par for the course, but lord help you if you owed these guys money or were a few weeks late. Your phone would never stop ringing and your credit reports would look like the Chiefs offense, uh, nothing good.

Posted in Craig_Glazer | Tagged | 31 Comments

Stargazing: Skies to Become No Spin Zone, More Phat for KC & Reefer Madness

The Sheraton people are going to stop the spinning restaurant on top of the former Hyatt Regency downtown.  It will be used for private parties and special events. They say the days of the spinning restaurant have come to an end.  From now on, if you want to spin while having dinner, you’ll have to try your luck at a trailer park in April.

*******

The Chiefs officially named Romeo Crennel head coach of the team. Crennel will be wearing many hats as he will run the team, assist in drafting players, bolster the offense and occasionally sub for BELLY BOY.

*******

A report last year says Marijuana use among kids has hit a 30 year high…so to speak.

 

Kelly Urich hosts the morning show on The Point 99.7 FM

Posted in Starbeams | Tagged | Leave a comment

Hearne: Round & Round They Go, But When Jardine’s Will Sell Nobody Knows

It’s the story that just won’t die…

One of the comments section dudes spent the better part of a week needling me for writing so frequently about Jardine’s. He had a point. On the other hand, when Kansas City’s top jazz club goes down ugly (not to mention weird), who am I to ignore it?

Especially given that for better and for worse, I’m in the unique position of having access to most of the players in this jazz soap. Lucky me.

Besides, what’s not to like about the local alt weekly and Fox news getting taken for a ride on the bogus sale story?

Meanwhile back at the mainstream news ranch, the Kansas City Star is more-or-less sitting on its hands after being embarrassed by its music writer getting outted by Jardine’s owner for accepting free brewskies.

Star copy editor / jazz dude Joe Klopus did manage to choke out the following non-news tidbit last week:

"Jardine’s update. Some recent online reports that former jazz venue Jardine’s has a new owner have been hasty, incorrect and perhaps wishful. But at press time for this section, a deal is reportedly in the pipeline."

Fat chance! Loosely translated, what Klopus is telling readers is he has no idea what’s going at Jardine’s. You can’t win if you don’t play, and clearly Joe Klo is not a playa.

So what is going on now at Jardine’s? A buncha bizarre stuff, but all behind the scenes.

Let’s sort it out for Joe and everyone who bought the Fox 4 / Pitch yarn that a pair of local married dudes bought it.

Never happened.

Multiple sources have confirmed that Jardine’s remains for sale with at least two separate ownership groups having expressed an interest in buying the club. One such group is headed by former Sprint exec Paul Wilson, who has produced documents subsequent to the misreported "sale" evidencing that the club is still being offered for sale by owner Beena Raja.

"At this point we’re no less interested in buying Jardine’s than we ever were," Wilson says. "We’ve got an investor and we’re waiting for the next shoe to drop."

As for the ownership issue, "I think Beena absolutely owns it," Wilson says. "I have an email from her stating that she owns it, sent the day after the Pitch story said that the two guys bought it. And I got an email from her lawyer with a contract 10 hours after Channel 4 had the supposed new owners on television saying they’d bought it."

Wilson says he’s been told Jardine’s is two to four months behind on rent and the club has remained dark since Thanksgiving, other than a handful of nights, the last being New Year’s Eve. The club’s January concert calendar also remains blank.

Next up?

"Hurry up and wait, I guess," Wilson says. "I think there’ll be another 30 days of topsy-turvy before things sort out. So we’re just getting our ducks in a row to make sure we’re the first in line when that happens."

Colliers senior property manager Scott Padon did not return calls for this column.

And the beat goes on…

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | Tagged | 14 Comments

New Jack City: KC Film Critics Lay Down Pre Oscar Picks, Descendents Best Picture

Sunday made for a festive evening just seven weeks ahead of February 26’s Oscar Night 2012.

The Kansas City’s Film Critics Circle voted for and unveiled its choices for best on film for 2011.

Women critics in the latest Paris fashions and tuxedo clad gents waved to excited crowds as they graced the red carpet leading to the festive Screenland Theatre in downtown KC, the site of this year’s main event.

And to think, once again I was part of it all.

Come to think of it, it was all just a dream.

In reality, a local group of some 34 shabbily-attired movie critics representing area radio, TV and newspaper outlets  – as well as a whole bunch of dot-com movie sites – brought their own covered dishes, broke bread and concluded the evening by voting for what they perceived were the best movies to grind through projectors the past year.

The local group announced its 45th annual list of winners in 12 catagories.

Taking top honors for BEST PICTURE was director Alexander Payne’s powerful drama THE DESCENDANTS starring George Clooney and Shailene Woodley. THE DESCENDANTS barely bettered the group’s first runner up DRIVE with Ryan Gosling and Carey Mulligan.

KC’s critics also honored Terrence Malick as BEST DIRECTOR for his TREE OF LIFE with Brad Pitt, Sean Penn and Jessica Chastain.

The BEST ACTOR award went to George Clooney for THE DESCENDANTS while Kirsten Dunst was named BEST ACTRESS for MELANCHOLIA in a close race over first runner up Viola Davis in THE HELP.

In the BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR catagories the honors went to Christopher Plummer for BEGINNERS in which he co-starred with Ewan McGregor, while Jessica Chastain won in the female catagory for THE TREE OF LIFE.

Other winners in K.C.’s critics annual cinematic poll included:

*ORIGINAL  SCREENPLAY: YOUNG ADULT
 
* ADAPTED SCREENPLAY: MONEYBALL
 
* ANIMATED FILM: RANGO
 
* FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM: A SEPARATION (Iran)
 
* DOCUMENTARY: Werner Herzog’s CAVE OF FORGOTTEN DREAMS
 
* SCI-FI / FANTASY or HORROR FILM: Martin Scorsese’s HUGO

For more about the local film critics organization and its membership roster go to kcfcc.org.

Posted in Jack_Poessiger | Tagged | 2 Comments

Glazer: ‘Full House’ Star Dave Coulier back in Town This Week at Stanford’s

Dave Coulier is back at Stanford’s this week…

It occured to me that Dave has been coming to our clubs here for well over a decade now. His long running TV show, Full House, was not only one of the biggest hits ever, but launched huge successes for all involved. The stars were Bob Saget,John Stamos, Coulier, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen and Candace Cameron.

All of these actors went on to make millions after the show ended.

That might be a first and only in this biz. Usually it’s, "Hey, whatever happened to what’s-his-name from Miami Vice? You know, the black guy."  That kind of thing.

Look, just cause you don’t have more TV shows or movies doesn’t make you a loser. Some actors do so well they just retire or move into another business. A few, like Henry Winkler, become producers and make tons of money.

Bob Saget went on to star of America’s Funniest Home Videos. So did Dave, and now he’s the naughty mouthed comic, doing theaters along with some film and TV work. Saget did Stanford’s in Westport a few times in the 90’s. Stamos did several other TV series and ER. He recently starred on Broadway and made the tabloid rounds with his divorce from hottie actress Rebecca Romijn.

Trust me, John has no trouble with the ladies.

The Olsen Twins made several hundred million dollars on books, DVDs, clothes – you name it.

Dave did several other TV series including The Surreal Life with Flavor Fav, Talented Kids, and America’s Funniest Home Videos. Dave’s big money comes from the hundreds of voiceovers he does and lending his voice to cartoon series like Ghost Busters and the Muppet Babies. Like Saget, Dave does lots of comedy work as well, both corporate and club work. He just loves it.

Coulier and I became pals long ago. We’re about the same age, which helps. And we share some crossover life stories. No, not crime, Dave is Mr. Clean. Dave was having lunch with me in 2002 at the Cheesecake Factory on the Plaza when I got a sad call that my Grandpa Bennie had passed out in his car out on Westport Road.  I left Dave and rushed to the scene. My Grandpa, who I loved like a father, died in my arms. I was crushed. Dave waited three hours for me to come back – great guy – full of compassion.

And it was Dave who hung with me and Hearne that fateful night in 2008 that our editor and my co-writer here, tripped on the steps at Jardine’s. Oddly, the last time Dave and I doubled dated a year ago, we went to Jardine’s. I only go there a couple times a year, that was the last time before the recent KCC Christmas party.

Coulier has strong talent in comedy, acting, music and voices. He’s a rare cleancut entertainer who has made it all work. He even flys his own airplane!

If you like family humor and a true talent, here’s your guy, my friend Dave Coulier.

And yes, all three Full House stars, Bob, John and Dave remain best friends to this day – that too is rare in show biz.

Posted in Craig_Glazer | Tagged | 20 Comments