KC Confidential

A funny thing happened on the way to the Plaza Saturday afternoon…

Those beefy biker dudes who commandeer the 15 Minute and No Parking spaces at 318 West 47th outside LatteLand – were nowhere to be found.

Had the Plaza finally forced Occupy LatteLand to find a new, legal home away from home? Had Police and Plaza Security finally teamed to enforce local traffic and parking laws – the ones that govern cars but for years have been ignored where hordes of illegally parked motorcyclists gather every weekend on the Plaza?

Naturally, this called for further investigation.

Turns out the bikers sometimes migrate to the curb outside Kona Grill overlooking Brush Creek, the Konans say. However Occupy LatteLand has been a Friday through Sunday mainstay for years.

And since last time out, LatteLand had closed before I could get their take on what it’s like having all of their 15 Minute parking spots and outdoor patio overrun by mostly non-paying bikers who park illegally forcing regular LatteLand customers to park blocks away and have to sit on outdoor, concrete ashtrays to sip their cappuccinos.

That’s right, ashtrays…

While interviewing a LatteLand staffer Sunday, a handsomely-attired, older woman asked me to grab a copy of the New York Times as I held the door for her to carry her drink to one of LatteLand’s two outside patios. I then further assisted by helping move a giant, cigarette sand-filled ashtray which she then covered with "all the news that’s fit to print" and seated herself.

Why you ask?

Because more than a half dozen elderly biker gentlemen had swiped the two chairs from LatteLand’s small patio and crammed them into its jam packed larger patio the bikersl had hunkered down in for the afternoon. None of whom rose to offer her a chair or move their bikes from the 15 Minute and No Parking zones. Zones filled with motorcycles for the hour I was there as well as before and after.

Other bikers crowded the sidewalks, straddled the newspaper and magazine racks or reclined on their bikes along the curb.

"You know, they’re all these regulars and they just sit on thier bikes, our patios and the newspaper racks," said one LatteLand staffer. "And I can understand their wanting to be out on their bikes on a beautiful day, but why aren’t they out riding them? You know, get a life."

Next stop; the nearby Walking Company store to check in with the young ladies who’d wondered aloud a week earlier why police and the Plaza allowed the bikers to park illegally for hours on end and clog the sidewalks.

Any biker problems now that the hanging out on the Plaza season is beginning to unfold?

"Well, they do stare at us," staffer Nikki complained. "They like check us out."

Rather dirty-old-man indiscreetly, Nikki and 19 year-old fellow staffer Jessica agreed.

"Like I went to LatteLand the other day and they all stood up and just looked at me," Jessica says "Like a full-on checkout. But you know, if they think they have the right to check us out like that, that’s just creepy."

Which stands in stark contrast to the obvious differences in how mostly polite young black kids are constantly being rousted by Plaza Security while the largely white, law breaking bikers are given a complete pass.

And if the urban kids so much as pause for even a few minutes on the sidewalks Plaza Security or police are all over them, advising them to "just keep moving."

The bikers are allowed to illegally hog the 15 Minute parking spots outside LatteLand – spots specifically designated for the businesses dash in / dash out coffee crowd.

It doesn’t make sense.

Why would Plaza Security and police who are so quick to ticket illegally parked cars allow the bikers to park illegally for three days each weekend hampering the businesses along 47th Street?

Surely they’re not afraid of the geriatric pocket rocketeers?

From the ever short annals of Groupon – the email discount biz I’ve long defended – comes an unusual proposition…

Look, in spite of what some readers have groused and grumbled about, there are sound reasons for businesses such as restaurants and oil change artists to go the way of the Groupon. It’s a great way to advertise and you reach a ton of potential new customers. And the discounts – when well thought out and properly structured – make total sense.

So as often as not, it’s win-win proposition for both the issuer of the Groupon and the customer buying it.

And now that everyone under the sun is in the game, the question becomes, what won’t they Groupon?

The answer being, nothing. There’s pretty much nothing Groupon won’t stoop to selling.

Not after its hawking of long term parking at KCI airport this past weekend.

That’s right, it’s come to that – they’re hawking $7 parking deals at the airport now.

Naturally, Groupon sicced its ever-obtuse deal describers on it.

“When neglected for long periods of time, cars may act out by sleeping in the street and consorting with tractors,” the KCI descripto begins. “Give your car attention while you’re away with this Groupon.”

Huh?

What’s getting a parking discount at the airport have to do with pampering your Mustang?

It’s not like somebody’s going to detail the car while you puddle jump to Des Moines for Comi-Con.

The brains behind the airport parking Groupon wouldn’t be happen to be KCI marketing main man Joe McBride would it?

“It was not,” McBride says. “It was the Holiday Inn at the airport.”

However, it’s not as though McBride didn’t entertain the notion.

“It’s been a while since we looked at it but it just didn’t make sense,” he says.

And while at first blush, it may not appear to make much sense to lots of people, it apparently did to a couple thousand local airport parkers who snapped up over 480 of the $7, three-day parking and shuttle service deals, more than 670 of the five day, $12 deals and more than 1,000 of the $15 seven day deals. Saving, $8, $13 and $20 respectively.

So much for consorting with tractors…

Who doesn’t love a good, old-fashioned train wreck?

And for the past four months, the wreck that won’t go away involves Kansas City’s leading jazz club Jardine’s. But hold it a minute before we go any further.

I hereby promise not to bog down in the endless stream of details – the few ups and many downs of this pathetically sad, ridiculously lame tale of musical chairs.

Suffice it to say, there are plenty of losers and villains in this jazz soap and precious few good guys and gals. But after making contact with Jardine’s owner Beena Raja and most of the key players yesterday, I can now report that…

It’s still a nightmare of monumental proportions.

Where to begin?

How about that despite a dearth of living, breathing, club-going jazz heads, cheerleaders like the Kansas City Star and oldsters of a certain stripe like little more than to pretend that Kansas City Jazz remains an important art form. Cherished by the masses who somehow are nowhere to be found in numbers greater than 20 to 50 – sometimes maybe 100 – on any given night.

Don’t get me wrong.

Having personally witnessed dozens of up-and-coming jazz musicians here  (and their substandard counterparts in other cities), Kansas City is in a league of its own for quality jazz talent.

But in a city of 2 million people Jardine’s was lucky to lure a hundred or two on the best of its nights.

Leaving amazingly talented musicians like Mark Lowery, Hermon Mehari and Mark Southerland to play tiny, often ill equipped venues and chain restaurants and hotel lobbys before audiences more interested in polite conversation than revering KC’s live art form.

Jardine’s was the exception to that unfortunate rule, but since late last year it’s gone dark.

A number of people stepped up to try and save the club but one by one they fell by the wayside.

Until a pair of gay dudes with few connections to jazz came to the rescue. Or so it seemed. However none of the local jazz players seem to have a clue what happened to them, and they’ve not returned calls or texts requesting a comment for weeks.

More recently landlord American Century put the club up for lease to any and all.

The latest? At least three suitors hoping to buy Jardines remain in play.

Beleaguered Jardine’s owner Beena Raja says they include a member of former local band The Nortons, the owner of the Phoenix jazz club, former Sprint exec Paul Wilson and possibly the two dudes who pulled the wool over Fox 4 and The Pitch, announcing last December that they’d purchased the club.

The current state of the club according to Raja?

"American Century still has not given me a repossession notice yet so it’s still up for sale," she says. "And they’re taking the position now that they’re not asking for any back rent."

Until recently sources say American Century’s leasing rep was asking for back rent in the neighborhood of $25,000 to $30,000 for parties interesting in reopening Jardine’s as a jazz club.

"The position they’re taking as of last Monday is the property managers are allowed to show the space to anybody and negotiate a new lease," Raja says. "So they’re cutting their losses."

New owners would have the option but not the obligation to pay former owner Greg Halstead for Jardine’s innards – tables, chairs, fixtures and restaurant equipment. Because Raja defaulted on a $50,000 note still owed to Halstead and secured by the club’s contents.

They wouldn’t have to pay Raja either except for one thing.

They would have to pay her if they wanted to retain Jardine’s the 3 am liquor and Sunday licenses which they would be foolish not to hang onto while the getting’s good.

"I guess they could rent the place but if they want the 3 am license, they’ll have to come to me," Raja says. "I mean, they can apply for a new liquor license and they’ll have to pay the back taxes, but they’ll never get the 3 am license and the Sunday license will be hard to get."

For the rights to the Jardine’s name and to transfer the licenses before the time to do so runs out, Raja is asking $20,000.

As for the dudes who claimed ownership of Jardine’s last year and later told KCC they planned on reopening by early February, "They’re just complete fakes, I don’t know what they want to do," Raja says. "The Phoenix guys are interested in buying it, I’m meeting with them…"

The gentlemen did not return requests for comment for this and the last several columns.

Raja’s take on who the best bet to get Jardine’s is?

"I don’t want to predict that and jinx myself again," she says. "But I don’t think the gay guys are gonna get it – it’s just a mess."

Radio can get messy at times…

It’s pretty much a bloodsport anymore with kickass air talent having to work for pennies on the dollar with precious little support.

And if you think the nearly 1,500 people that have bought the farm at the Kansas City Star in recent years is an anomaly, think again.

Stroll through the ghost town headquarters of local radio stations here and count the empty desks.

But let’s move on, shall we?

To the under-reported mess at the Entercom-owned station at 1660 AM.

You may know it as classical radio station KXTR-FM. Or the hastily conceived Radio Bach (a name change enacted last year so Entercom could prevent its legendary call letters KUDL from being pirated by the competition.

That after Entercom somewhat foolishly blew up KUDL FM last spring in order to simulcast KMBZ News Radio 980 AM on the FM dial to try and pick up the more affluent, FM listeners.

Just one problem…

Not only did Entercom kiss hundreds of thousands of dollars in revenues that KUDL was billing goodbye, the combined ratings of KMBZ on both AM and FM not only failed to increase – they declined!

In short, the move backfired because not only did Entercom lose revenue, it lost listeners.

In its latest gamble, Entercom announced recently it would kill off Radio Bach and launch an all-business, KMBZ sister station March 5th on 1660.

However, in one of the most under-reported local business stories in years, the poster boy for KMBZ’s new business station – Mike Shanin – reportedly refused to go on the air hours before the launch. Placing Entercom in the embarrassing position of having to find a new lead host and delaying the station’s official launch an additional month when Krista Klaus steps in for Shanin. Klaus will debut Monday, elevating the station out of its current "soft opening" status.

After Entercom can locate and hire a producer for her show. Radio Bach and KXTR main man Patrick Neas had reportedly been offered the producer job at the new KMBz biz channeled but had turned it down after being offered only a fraction of what Entercom had been paying him on Radio Bach.

Entercom was able to do damage control by getting a local media blogger to gloss over the mess.

Allowing KC Confidential to share with you now what radio insiders have been saying about Shanin’s puzzling behavior for weeks.

"Supposedly two hours before Mike’s show was scheduled to launch, he said he was not going to go on the air," says one source.

The reason being?

"Well, it wasn’t because he wanted more money, he wanted Entercom to hire a producer for his show to do show prep and schedule guests, freeing him to come in, read the prepared news and banter with callers."

In other words, rather than do the leg work, the stodgy septuagenarian reportedly only wanted to show up and showboat.

Cutbacks in radio revenues had largely forced KMBZ and other stations to eliminate the producer position leaving only what in the trade they call "board ops" to answer, screen calls and make sure commercials, news and the like are properly embedded.

Prior to Shanin’s recent demotion from co-host of KMBZ’s embattled afternoon drive, his partner Scott Parks was the dude mainly responsible for acting as the show’s producer, sources say.

As part of Shanin’s new gig he was to do morning, mini business reports on KMBZ.

Shanin also was reportedly pissed because the first two VIP guests he’d book were unaware that Entercom hadn’t really promoted the show – opting for a soft opening – and Shanin was embarrassed they’d be going on the air with fewer listeners than I have IQ points.

And as might be imagined, Entercom head Dave Alpert was reportedly furious with Shanin and checked with Entercom’s lawyers about firing him. However with large advertsing cutbacks in the wake of Rush Limbaugh‘s stunningly sexist blunder a few weeks back, KMBZ could ill afford to risk pissing off and losing Shanin advertisers, so it reportedly decided to keep him on for the time being at KMBZ, says another source.

"So they cancelled Mike’s contract with KMBZ and kept him on on an hourly basis," says the source.

The odds of Entercom keeping Shanin on for long now that he’s bitten the hand that feeds him?

"Not very good," says the source. "When you know you’ve pissed off Dave Alpert, the odds of Mike hanging onto that job very long are slim and none."

Now here’s a little reward for readers who waded thru this long and wearisome mess:

"If this new KMBZ business station works, the tentative plan is to move it from 1660 AM to KMBZ 980 AM’s signal which is much stronger. So it will be KMBZ FM’s business partner and Entercom will leave the main KMBZ on FM."