Harley: Man of a Million Words Hits on Troubled KC Jeweler, Plaza, TKC & Glaze’s Grrrls

Against my better judgment…

I present you with a “column” submitted by everybody’s favorite punching bag (and edited by moi). Enjoy. May I suggest you take it with a grain of salt (or a boulder)?

My new column on KC Confidential….

SCHOOL THE FOOLS

AllThatGlittersWhat do KU basketball and the KC jeweler story have in common?

This is getting quite interesting. My tipsters have given me info that nothing really was
taken, but was “lost” including a very expensive watch. The supposed subject
was getting 250k as a buyout and was sleeping at 73rd Street. And that Hearne’s story is probably blown out of proportion.

I visited with key individuals and they felt this story was blown out of proportion and that nobody needed to dress up like a shrub outside the postoffice. And that Paul Wilson didn’t need to play Miami Vice and hide under his dashboard to avoid being seen…. everything is under control.
Unfortunately not all people born with silver spoons trun out as good as
Hearne and Southman (hover that is). Some have problems and hopefully this will blow over!!!!

More to come, but my sources are “in the deal” and Hearne and Paul can go to the late night diner and find some really good diamond deals. Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | 76 Comments

Hearne: Westport Braces for Urban Influx

IMG_3833Westport is worried, really worried…

And bracing for the worst. Because while for the past several years it’s the Country Club Plaza that’s been garnering headlines about urban youth hanging out and making its more affluent, mostly white patrons uncomfortable and uneasy, the issue has started to spread back into Westport.

As evidenced by the ominous signs in the windows of Westport’s Gusto Bar & Lounge advising patrons that firearms and weapons are not allowed. Along with a dress code tailor made to ward off hip-hop types with “exposed underwear,” “wave caps,” “jewelry which poses safety risks,” “tank tops,” “baggy clothing,” “jumpsuits” and the like.

There’s more.

Gusto appears so worried about the crowd it might attract that there’s even a clause in bold letters at the bottom of the sign advising, “You May Not Modify Your Wardrobe At Time Of Entry To Meet The Dress Code.”

Which would seem to imply that once the club determines that you may be a gangbanger they don’t want you loopholing your way in by merely slipping into sheep’s clothing.

Shades of the colorful dress code at infamous Westport dance club America’s Pub. Continue reading

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | 7 Comments

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Edelman: Mocking Musicals at the Quality Hill Playhouse

JeOfQAeZchjDBAImtnk1FkTGubhFwOAu7Z9JORLv7u0If you like your Broadway show tunes shaken and skewered, belly up to the Quality Hill Playhouse for a very clever, very funny little show with a mouthful of  title called The Musical of Musicals.. The Musical…

Yeah, it’s a spoof. Kent Barnhart first produced this charmer eight or so years ago. Now he and a talented company have dusted off the pipes, plugged in the cattle prod and unleashed a whole lot of laughter down on 11th Street between Broadway and Central.

This Musical’s conceit is a simple one– you take the old boy meets girl, girl misses rent, landlord demands girl marry him storyline (I know, you’ve seen it a hundred times)  and dress it up with the music of five of Broadway’s greatest songwriting teams. Each skit lasts about 20 minutes– you get five shows for the price of one! Continue reading

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New Jack City: New ‘Verrückt’ Water Slide Has KC Media Tongue Tied

Screen Shot 2014-04-28 at 6.20.02 PMI’ll admit it…
For a German immigrant like me there are a number of English words I have trouble pronouncing (editor’s note: and spelling). 
Especially if they contain the letters R or TH.
So it is with the German language which most Americans have a tough time pronouncing. Especially when it comes to umlauts in a German word, their pronunciation skills usually turns to mush mouth. Continue reading
Posted in Jack Poessiger | 2 Comments

Hearne: Sensationalistic ‘Coverage’ of Black Kids on Plaza

Country-Club-PlazaWhat’s in a word?

Plenty when it comes to terms like “flash mob.” Especially in regard to the recent nighttime gatherings of urban youth on the Country Club Plaza.

Take Saturday night when between 100 and 125 or so “black kids” wandered the Plaza and surrounding area – two were arrested – one for fighting, another for possession of a gun.

Violent Teen Flash Mob” was how Tony’s Kansas City foolishly described the action.

Hold it right there… Continue reading

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | 59 Comments

Donnelly: Sporting Limps Home After Last Second Loss to New England

Embedded image permalinkSporting Kansas City couldn’t find the goal even if they had a map of the penalty area with a big X on it Saturday night at Gillette Stadium.

Heading into the final few seconds the game was knotted 0-0.  But for the second time this season, KC gave up a game winner in second half stoppage time.  Except this time, the home New England Revolution scored twice in the final minute and a half after KC had much better chances for the bulk of the game. Continue reading

Posted in Matthew_Donnelly | 1 Comment

Hearne: Concerned Reader Touches on ‘Big Gravy’s’ Weight Problem

20140425_200931Pardon the interruption but…

KCC reader and occasional contributor Chuck Lowe is worried. And not just about the usual suspects, you know, the fate of Malaysian Air Flight 370, Chelsea Clinton‘s baby and the Chiefs draft picks.

Nope, Ground Chuck is concerned about the girth of a certain former Kansas City Star sports columnist. Perhaps you know him, he goes by the name Jason Whitlock.

No kidding.

“Seriously, Whitlock is dead in two years if he doesn’t drop a buck fifty,” Lowe laments.  “He’s fatter than the Federal Deficit. Honestly, I saw him in person not too long before he went to LA and I think he has put on at least 100 pounds. Dead in two years. This picture is from today on ESPN’s Pardon the Interruption. That’s my flash on my camera blowing up right over his heart.  Poor guy really needs help.” Continue reading

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | 11 Comments

Leftridge: Chiefs Release Schedule, Could Go…All…The…Way!

chiefscoverShortly after Easter—when Christ was risen from a grave-cave with a giant boulder in front of it?—the true Holy Day for football fans occurred: Commissioner Roger Goodell descended from Mount Lombardi and shone unto his Zubaz’d believers the 2014 NFL football schedule.

And it was with measured awe, great consideration and studious review that these Busch-bellied prophets then made their own proclamations concerning THEIR particular squadron.

What I mean is, mostly they called in to local sports talk radio and gave their predictions.

And so spoke these gridiron gurus and seers of the unseen.

And while I don’t profess to have a crystal ball, I DID date a stripper named Crystal once, so there’s no doubt in my mind that my predictions are 100% accurate. (And possibly, covered in glitter and Lavender-Mocha Morning Body Mist.) Continue reading

Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports | Tagged , , , | 16 Comments

Mancow: Musical Patriotism in Sheep’s Clothing

Gorky_Park_-_Gorky_Park_album_coverThose Russians are bastards aren’t they?

Even after Glasnost and Perestroika I never trusted them. They still have nukes pointed at us. Would anyone trust someone that had guns aimed at them?

I still like the song Gorky Park but it’s BS. I like Sting’s “Russians,” which is right on except that the theme was really for unilateral disarmament by the United States because we’re the good guys and more civilized, therefore we should initiate things like that.

That of course would have been suicide. Continue reading

Posted in Mancow | 10 Comments

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Paul Wilson: The April 25th Weak in Review — Flat Earth Edition

lovehatesspringsteenLove Has No Love for Sax

Courtney Love, that bastion of musical history and drug addled commentary, has taken on rocker Bruce Springsteen. While softening her misguided comments with, “He’s a nice guy,” Love stated her problem with the Boss’ music is that “saxophones just don’t belong in rock ‘n’ roll.” It matters not that the saxophone has been used by everyone from The Cure to Pink Floyd, Love doesn’t get it.

Here’s some food for thought, Courtney: if Kurt had put a sax in his mouth, he’d still be in Nirvana.

Circumstantial Evidence

Jeffrey Chapman of Great Bend is charged with first-degree murder. However that’s not the story. Chapman is afraid the tattoo spelling out the word “murder” across his neck might prejudice a jury, so he wants the State to hire a tattoo artist to remove or cover it up.

“Prosecutors say they aren’t opposed to Jeffrey Chapman covering his tattoo, but Barton County’s sheriff says he’s against transporting Chapman to a licensed tattoo facility — the only places tattoo artists are allowed to practice under Kansas law.”

Chapman’s trial is scheduled to start Monday in killing of Damon Galliart, whose body was found by hunters in a roadside ditch in rural Great Bend.

His attorney says in a motion the tattoo would be extremely prejudicial if seen by a jury. I’ve taken a close look at the tattoo and determined that it can easily be changed to the word “DOUCHENOZZLE” which is far less prejudicial. Continue reading

Posted in Paul Wilson | 28 Comments

Jack Goes Confidential: ‘The Other Woman’ Delivers—Until the Halfway Mark

maxresdefaultSure it’s a chick flick but that’s not the issue here…

How can a very funny and well-acted tale of double—no make that triple adultery—deteriorate into just another goofy, humdrum, predictable revenge comedy?

It boggles the mind.

THE OTHER WOMAN doesn’t break any new ground, but it’s well enough written and executed to often make one laugh out loud. In the FIRST HALF of the film, that is.

The concept is a simple one. Continue reading

Posted in Jack Poessiger | 4 Comments

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Starbeams: Extreme Weather, Joe Biden, New KCI for Possum Trot, NFL Draft & Peeps

UnknownVice president Joe Biden just returned from visiting the Ukraine.  Completely unrelated, this is a good site for an underground bomb shelter:

http://www.atlassurvivalshelters.com/

                                                                      *******

Call me old fashioned, but when did all weather become extreme or severe?

                                                                      *******

Still no word on whether or not KCI will become one terminal facility, or become the latest refurbished, older building in the metro. Either way, hundreds of millions of your dollars will be spent to save us from all the terrorists targeting Possum Trot. Continue reading

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Hearne: Triple A Station ‘The Bridge’ Still Floundering

Screen Shot 2014-04-23 at 10.38.04 PMIt may not look like it, but I’m seriously rooting for The Bridge...

The adult, album, alternative radio station whose call letters are KTBG 90.9 FM improved its signal and moved here late last year after operating for years out of nearby Warrenburg, Mo. That after being acquired for beaucoup bucks by KCPT Channel 19.

On top of all that, it received a potential ratings gift of sorts when local Triple A station Alice 102.1 FM flipped to an adult contemporary format in February.

However The Bridge’s early ratings returns were unkind…really unkind. Continue reading

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | 23 Comments

Sounds Good: Local Natives @ Granada, Arcade Fire @ Starlight, Farmer’s Ball Finals @ Bottleneck

New release of the week: Most Messed Up by Old 97’s.

This is the first release from this Texas alt-country band since 2011, and so far the reviews have been pretty decent – even garnering a “must-listen” from Rolling Stone.

Pssst.  Even though the album doesn’t drop until April 29th, you can stream the whole thing free here until the 28th.

Do it.   Continue reading

Posted in Matthew_Donnelly, Uncategorized | 3 Comments

Hearne: Local Promoter Says Obamas Both Gay

michelle_obamaMove over Donald Trump

The divide between what prominent locals are more than willing to share with one another and – on second thought – what they are willing to attach their names to. Case in point a conversation I had yesterday with one of Kansas City’s best known promoters, who out of the clear blue sky informed me matter-of-factly that, “Michelle Obama is a man – look it up.”

Seriously, I asked?

“There are dozens of websites and movies made saying that she’s a man,” he responded.

Hold it, movies? Continue reading

Posted in Hearne_Christopher | 24 Comments

Sutherland: THE ‘MINISTRY OF TRUTH’ REVISITED

 

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Big Brother is watching

 “Before the Hate had proceeded for thirty seconds, uncontrollable exclamations of rage were breaking out from half the room…But what was strange was that although the Kochs were hated and despised by everybody, although every day, and a thousand times a day, on platforms, on the telescreen, in newspapers, in books, their theories were refuted, smashed, ridiculed, held up to the general gaze for the pitiful rubbish that they were—in spite of all this, their influence never seemed to grow less.  Always there were fresh dupes waiting to be seduced by them.  A day never passed when spies and saboteurs acting under their directions were not unmasked by the Thought Police.  They were the commanders of a vast shadow army, an underground network of conspirators dedicated to the overthrow of the cause of Truth, Justice, and The Affordable Care Act.”

This is a paraphrase of one of the best known passages in George Orwell’s ‘1984.’ 

In his nightmarish vision of a totalitarian future, the author describes a mandatory indoctrination session where the hero and his co-workers at “The Ministry of Truth” (i.e. the propaganda ministry) are forced to take part in a daily “Two Minute Hate.”  They have to watch a video broadcast designed to get them stirred up against whoever is the villain “du jour,” i.e. whoever is the foremost enemy of the regime at the moment. Continue reading

Posted in Dwight D. Sutherland, Jr. | 18 Comments

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