Author Archives: Kelly Urich
Starbeams: No Sex in the City, Steroids, Vaginal Orgasms & MTV
Everyone’s holding “Party Like It’s 1985” signs around town. For me, that means sitting around the house watching MTV with no hope of any sex. … Continue reading
Starbeams: Chiefs Blind Goodell, Sporting Crashes Capitol & Bring back Boone
Sporting Kansas City got to meet President Obama in the White House Wednesday afternoon. They achieved this incredible feat by sneaking over the White House fence. … Continue reading
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Starbeams: Ray Rice, Harassment KC Style & Chiefs ‘Wonderland’
What Ray Rice did in that elevator was wrong on so many levels. But am I the only one who thinks the elevator company deserves credit for the door not closing on her head? ******* Kansas City, Missouri is considering a … Continue reading
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Tagged John Mayer, Kansas City Chiefs, Kelly Urich, Ray Rice, Southern Comfort, The Point 99.7 FM
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Starbeams: Death of Joan Rivers & Free Speech, Red Friday, David Lawrence Naked
Ten years from now there will be no comics like Joan Rivers because the world will be so politically correct, our vocabulary will be reduced to 50 words that don’t offend people. … Continue reading
Starbeams: Lenexa Roundabouts, Goo Goo Dolls & Sofia Vergara
Little Known Fact: The movie “Maze Runner” was filmed in the endless string of traffic circles in Lenexa. ******* White students are now a minority in U.S. public schools. This means Mexican restaurants can finally start charging money for chips. … Continue reading
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Starbeams: Katy Perry @ Sprint, Byron’s British Replaces Jack Henry, Grandpa Rock?
The protests in Missouri are getting pretty violent. I’ve never seen so many people upset about losing a Frozen Custard store. … Continue reading
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Tagged Bud Ice Challenge, Fram Filters, Framily, Katy Perry at Sprint Center, Kid Rock, Sprint
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Starbeams: Foo’s Fighters vs Brookside & Missouri vs Missour-uh
A suspicious looking package stopped downtown traffic near 13th and Holmes this afternoon. That’s the last time I take Viagra with lunch. … Continue reading
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Starbeams: Dumb Ways to Say ‘Missouri,” Virgin Kid Corral & Robin Williams
I’m traveling to Ferguson, Missouri this weekend to protest…Governor Jay Nixon saying Missouruh, instead of Missouri. … Continue reading
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Tagged Ferguson, Jay Nixon, Kelly Urich, Missouri, Robin Williams, The Point 99.7 FM, Virgin Airlines
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Starbeams: Loni Does 69, Jeff Gordon & Amtrak Do 43, Sprint Flounders
The good news! Sprint is about to name a new C.E.O. The bad: It’s that Royals fan from South Korea. … Continue reading
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Tagged Amtrak, Fritz's Railroad Restaurant, Jeff Gordon, Kelly Urich, Loni Anderson, Sprint CEO, WKRP in Cincinnati
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Starbeams: Obama @ The Uptown Wednesday, Fox 4 Fox Kerri Stowell Takes a Fall
President Obama will be at the Uptown in Kansas City this Wednesday. His staff has yet to inform him the Uptown is not a golf course. … Continue reading
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Tagged Country Club Plaza, Kerri Stowell, Mark Clegg, President obama, Uptown Theater Kansas City
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Starbeams: Earthquakes in Kansas, Hot Redheads Shortage & Shoot to Kill
The number of earthquakes in Kansas is on the rise but experts aren’t sure why. One guess is because Kansas offers better incentives than Missouri. … Continue reading
Starbeams: KC to Get VP Convention, World Cup, Sting, Affordable Starbucks?
So, let me get this straight. You can lose in the World Cup and still advance? How can we get the Chiefs and Royals into that league? … Continue reading
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Starbeams: Steaking Out the Plaza, Joe Montana & Prostitutes @ World Cup
M & S Grill on the plaza will be replaced by a Morton’s Steakhouse Grill. FINALLY! A steakhouse in Kansas City! … Continue reading
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Starbeams: O.J. Simpson, Peyton Manning, KCPL Building & ‘Believin’
We are coming up on the 20th anniversary of the OJ Simpson event. Thankfully, my kids hear about a slow, white bronco and they think of Peyton Manning. … Continue reading
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Starbeams: Adios Arsenio, Aging Beavers, Rodman to Rescue & Marino
Now that Arsenio Hall‘s show has been cancelled, I have no idea where I’m going to steal content for this blog. … Continue reading
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Starbeams: Jack Henry, KCPD Madness, The UN, Gas & Kim and Kanye
Jack Henry is closing its doors on the Plaza after 83 years of dressing Kansas Citians. Eighty-three years is quite a run. A lot of us can remember when Jack Henry was the weatherman on WDAF. Or was that Dan … Continue reading
Starbeams: The George Brett Diet, Rep Convention Update & Most Wanted
Now that I’ve legally changed my name to George Brett, I can get a restaurant reservation anywhere! ******* Kansas City is still in the running to host the Republican National Convention. We are up against Dallas, Cleveland and Denver. If … Continue reading
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Starbeams: Donald Sterling, Beyonce, Jar Jar Binks & KC Blood Center
Let’s put Donald Sterling and Beyonce’s sister together and let them sort it out. … Continue reading
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Starbeams: Climate Change Swindle, New KCI, Ukraine Getaway & Spank Month
The U.S. National Climate Assessment says so called “Climate Change” is already here and more extreme weather is on the way. They also forecast that the more they extreme weather they predict, the more federal grant money they will get. … Continue reading
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