Author Archives: Brandon Leftridge
Leftridge: Will the Royals Blow the Trade Deadline by Pretending to be Contenders?
Because it is mid-to-late July, I am obligated by the Internet Sportswriter Code to talk about whether my city’s baseball team should be A) buyers, B) sellers, or C) do nothingers as the league’s trade deadline approaches. The Royals are … Continue reading
Leftridge: Royals May be Faltering, but Hey, They’ve Got Three All Stars
Look, we all know that the Major League Baseball All Star Game is a TOTAL waste of time. It’s usually boring and nobody plays hard and, despite the recent-ish rule that the winning side secures home field advantage for their … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports
Tagged All Star Game, Brandon Leftridge, KC Royals, RIP Alex Gordon
1 Comment
Leftridge: Happy 4th, Unless Obama Has His Way
The hardest part about celebrating America’s Independence Day isn’t grilling the perfect hamburger, or selecting an appropriate array of beers to wow your guests. It’s not trying to keep your dog from nervous-urinating all over your carpet at the sound … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge
Tagged Benghazi, Brandon Leftridge, grandpa on fire, Obummer
16 Comments
Leftridge: Royals’ Midseason Awards 2014, Ridiculousness Edition
Midway through the 2014 baseball season, the Kansas City Royals find themselves a frustratingly average team, ensconced firmly in second place of the American League Central. Okay, it’s not the exact midway point in the season yet, but we’re close … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge
Tagged Brandon Leftridge, Cookie Monster, KC Royals, Midseason awards
9 Comments
Leftridge: Royals Headed to World Series, Clearly
It’s sad that it feels like the Kansas City Royals just won the World Series, but it is what it is. When fans—and the organization as a whole—have been so beaten and battered with perpetual disappointment, sole possession of first … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports
Tagged Brandon Leftridge, FIRST PLACE ROYALS, KC Royals
13 Comments
Leftridge: History’s Greatest Fathers
There’s a poignant moment in John Singleton’s classic 1992 film Boyz n the Hood where the main protagonist Tre (Cuba Gooding Jr., only before he’s being played by Cuba Gooding Jr.) is sitting by the ocean, fishing with his father, … Continue reading
Leftridge: Draft Happens, Royals Draft a Player
Because the Kansas City Royals didn’t absolutely suck at everything last year, the were sullied with the 17th pick in this year’s draft. And with that pick, they selected left-handed pitcher Brandon Finnegan from TCU. Finnegan—a diminutive man who was … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports
Tagged Brandon Leftridge, KC Royals, Manaea, MLB draft, Zimmer
5 Comments
Leftridge: Royals May Recap (aka Here We Blow Again)
There is, perhaps, no play more emblematic of the Kansas City Royals’ May—and maybe of the Kansas City Royals last 30 or so years, actually—than DH (the “D” is for “doughy!) Billy Butler getting thrown out at first on a … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged Brandon Leftridge, Designated Donut Billy Butler, Royals Recap
3 Comments
Leftridge: Craigslist Crap, Memorial Day Edition
Memorial Day is finally here… Can you believe it’s been a year already? It seems like only yesterday we were all going to the cemetery and paying respect to our fine nation’s departed service people. Well, those of us who … Continue reading
Leftridge: Moustakas Needs Help and Moore Blows Goats
Mike Moustakas is not good right now. He hasn’t been good this whole season, and frankly, he wasn’t very good last season, either. In fact, statistically speaking, he is one of the worst everyday hitters in the Major Leagues. Oh … Continue reading
Leftridge: Well, it’s the NFL Draft, or Whatever
I officially don’t give a shit about the NFL Draft. Maybe it’s the fact that it now seems to be a month-long process teeming with pre-draft shows leading up to the actual event. Video vignettes about how a 400-pound orphan … Continue reading
Leftridge: April Royals Recap: The Kids Are Alright
The Royals’ month of April was almost exactly how I would have scripted it, if someone came along and asked me to script how this season would start. (And yes, I understand that, much like the hypothetical situation of someone … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports
Tagged Brandon Leftridge, KC Royals, recap, Yordano Ventura
6 Comments
Leftridge: Chiefs Release Schedule, Could Go…All…The…Way!
Shortly after Easter—when Christ was risen from a grave-cave with a giant boulder in front of it?—the true Holy Day for football fans occurred: Commissioner Roger Goodell descended from Mount Lombardi and shone unto his Zubaz’d believers the 2014 NFL … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports
Tagged Brandon Leftridge, greatest dynasty ever, KC chiefs, NFL Schedule
16 Comments
Leftridge: Royals Look Like Royals After 15 Games
So the Royals are above .500 again, and all of the nut-jobs that were predicting a World Series victory (or at the very least, a WS appearance) are back from the ledge… This is good, as I hate to see … Continue reading
Leftridge: TV Time; Channeling Fargo
A month or so ago, my wife made a startling revelation: she’d never seen the darkly comedic, melodically disturbing 1996 masterpiece Fargo… After consulting a divorce attorney—who hung up on me after explaining that this was “a grotesquely ridiculous reason … Continue reading
Leftridge: BREAKING AND EXCLUSIVE NEWS (It’s Opening Day)
Never mind the fact that, as I write this, it’s in the mid-30s outside, with a wind that makes it feel positively Arctic… Forget that the Royals are 0-2 on the season, with gut-wrenching losses that came in the ninth … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports
Tagged Brandon Leftridge, Go Royals!, Kia salesman, Mendy Lopez, Opening Day
3 Comments
Leftridge: Bring on the Baseball
It’s finally upon us. The start of baseball’s glorious regular season is so close that if it were an umpire, Roberto Alomar would have no problem hitting it with a disease-riddled loogie. (Timely reference, to be sure.) But all phlegming … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports
Tagged 2014 Prediction, Brandon Leftridge, KC Royals
13 Comments
Leftridge: Royals’ Rotation Figures to be a Mixed Bag
To the surprise of nobody—and to the consternation, perhaps, of only those who dislike things that are totally awesome—fire-balling phenom Yordano Ventura has officially been named as the final starter in the 2014 Kansas City Royals rotation. Call it the … Continue reading
Leftridge: NFL Free Agency Starts, Chiefs Departing Left and Right
As is custom this time of year, the NFL free agency period is underway. There have been some big (though mostly unexpected) moves, like the Chicago Bears releasing DE Julius Peppers, the Dallas Cowboys releasing DE DeMarcus Ware (who is … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports
Tagged Brandon Leftridge, free agency, John Dorsey, KC chiefs
42 Comments
Leftridge: TV Time: Just in Time for Easter, ABC Premieres Resurrection
Upon first hearing about ABC’s new sci-fi drama Resurrection, my first thought was, “oh. OK. So… Walking Dead, but without the hilariously graphic violence due to network television limitations.” Then, I read a very brief synopsis—“dead people come back to … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Entertainment
Tagged Brandon Leftridge, dead people, TV Time, Walking Dead
5 Comments
