Author Archives: Brandon Leftridge
Leftridge: I Had My Groceries Delivered Today, Like Some Kind of Big Shot
I was born and raised in Kansas City, moved to Chicago for a spell, then moved back. KC will always be my one true love, but there are a LOT of things I miss about Chicago. I miss the Brown … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge
Tagged bison meat, Brandon Leftridge, Chicago, grocery delivery, Grubhub, Hy-Vee, Peapod
17 Comments
Leftridge: What to do in St. Joseph When the Chiefs’ Practice is Over
If watching dudes practice football plays is your thing, this is your time of year. And lucky for you (unless you’re our one, weird Malaysian reader), you’re probably within an hour’s drive or so of being able to watch real … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Entertainment, Sports
Tagged Brandon Leftridge, Glore Psychiatric Museum, KC chiefs, Krug Park, Mexican food, St. Joe
7 Comments
Leftridge: The Kansas City Royals Are Going to Kill Me
The Royals went out and got Johnny Cueto and Ben Zobrist which is exactly what I hoped they’d do, so I know now that the acquisitions have to be huge mistakes because I’m never right about shit like this. They … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports
Tagged Ben Zobrist, Boulevard, Brandon Leftridge, Brush Creek, Eric Hosmer, hobo-piss, KC Royals, Lorenzo Cain, Nori Aoki
20 Comments
Leftridge: Trade Deadline Approaches; Offense Targets
Last week, I pleaded with the Royals to sign a starting pitcher. This was before Jason Vargas blew up his elbow (though that wasn’t exactly shocking, given his previous injuries this season) and before OPENING DAY STARTER Yordano Ventura had … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports
Tagged Ben Zobrist, Brandon Leftridge, Cespedes, Jay Bruce, KC Royals, orgasm in pant, Trade Deadline, Upton
13 Comments
Leftridge: Trade Deadline Approaches; Starting Pitching Targets
First, let me preface this piece with a few facts. The Royals are a good team. The Royals actually might be a VERY good team. The Royals are in first place of the American League Central and have been for … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports
Tagged Brandon Leftridge, Cole Hamels, fever dreams, Johnny Cueto, KC Royals, Trade Deadline
19 Comments
Leftridge: Hurry Back, Alex Gordon
In a piece dated July 14, 2012—so, long before most casual fans has amassed significant and appropriate appreciation—I suggested in no uncertain terms that the success of this team rode squarely on the shoulders of the (then) oft-injured Lorenzo Cain. … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports
Tagged Alex Gordon, Ben Zobrist, Brandon Leftridge, groin, Lorenzo Cain
1 Comment
Leftridge: Random Thoughts on the Insanely Good Rolling Stones Show
Holy shit, the Rolling Stones fucking rocked. The crowd was very eclectic. And huge. Huge and eclectic. I expected a lot of older folks, and there were plenty, but there were also a lot of disinterested teens there WITH those … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge
Tagged Arrowhead, Brandon Leftridge, Mick Jagger, narcotics, The Rolling Stones
13 Comments
Leftridge: Guess I’ll Go See The Rolling Stones
If you need me on Saturday night, I’ll be at Arrowhead Stadium along with tens-of-thousands of other tired, old white people with at least enough discretionary income to blow it on watching a handful of grandfathers prance around a stage … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Entertainment
Tagged Arrowhead, Brandon Leftridge, The Rolling Stones, Vampire Bob Dylan
26 Comments
Leftridge: Crap for Sale on Craigslist, Father’s Day Edition
Dads, right? I mean, we all got ‘em. Most of the time, they’re at LEAST pretty OK if not better, and even if they’re in prison or like, violently racist, they’re still our DADS, right? They brought us into this … Continue reading
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Tagged Brandon Leftridge, Craigslist, crap for sale on craigslist, dad, Dads, Father's Day
5 Comments
Leftridge: TV Time: Orange is the New Black is Back for Season Three
I’ve got a thing for prison, I guess… Maybe it stems from my white-trash roots, long-nurtured by a stream of Canadian Mist whiskey and viewed through the lens of a Section 8 apartment’s dirty, cracked window. A good portion of … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Entertainment
Tagged Brandon Leftridge, Canadian Mist, Netflix, Orange is the New Black, TV Time
7 Comments
Leftridge: Horse Wins Race
If you turned on the television today, or logged on to the internet, or went to the store to buy some pineapples, you already know that a horse with a misspelled name won Belmont Stakes, and as a result the … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports
Tagged Belmot, Brandon Leftridge, horse, jockey, Triple Crown
15 Comments
Leftridge: Royals’ May Recap
For a wondrous, magical period in May, the Kansas City Royals held the best record in baseball. And maybe we’ll look back on it like we look back on 2003, when they were the best team in baseball! for the … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports
Tagged Brandon Leftridge, KC Royals, Kendrys Morales, Royals Recap, steamy man-love, Wade Davis
3 Comments
Leftridge: How to Spend Your Memorial Day
Memorial Day. A day when we are to memorialize those who paid the greatest price while serving our country. And plenty of people do it right—they lay wreaths on graves and look at the flag and watch a lot of … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge
Tagged Brandon Leftridge, holidays, Johnny Tremain, Memorial Day, potato casserole
11 Comments
Leftridge: TV Time: Catching Up With Wayward Pines
Wayward Pines is like Twin Peaks, except modern and for Fox. It also has nothing to do with David Lynch, the person responsible for making Twin Peaks great. Instead, it’s from the mind of M. Night Shyamalan, which is, at … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Entertainment
Tagged Brandon Leftridge, M. Night Shymalan, Matt Dillon's D, TV Time, Wayward Pines
9 Comments
Leftridge: Crap for Sale on Craigslist, Mother’s Day Edition
Recent studies have shown that, scientifically, most people were born with a mother. (Or born from a mother? Born OF a mother? Whatever.) Furthermore, a 1998 survey by research doctors in the field of science shows that most people keep … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge
Tagged Brandon Leftridge, Craigslist, crap for sale on craigslist, Joe Montana, Mother's Day, murderer
48 Comments
Leftridge: Here Comes the Fight of the Century (Is What People Said on Saturday When This Was Originally Written)
***This piece was originally scheduled to run Saturday, May 2nd. Oops.*** There’s a boxing contest tonight, and according to those who know these sort of things, it’s the biggest match since “Gentleman” George Gagland fought “Irish” Mickey O’Syphilis for two … Continue reading
Leftridge: Ventura Poised to Destroy Royals’ Season
Kansas City Royals’ ace Yordano Ventura needs to knock this shit off… In case you missed the highlights from last night’s late inning victory against the Chicago White Sox, here’s what happened: In the seventh inning, Chicago’s Adam Eaton hit … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports
Tagged Brandon Leftridge, Brett Lawrie, KC Royals, Lorenzo Cain, Yordano Ventura
24 Comments
Leftridge: Will Billy Butler Be Booed? Brobably.
When Johnny Damon returned to the Kansas City Royals as a visitor—first after being traded to the Oakland Athletics and later after signing with the Boston Red Sox in free agency—he was booed mercilessly. The affable, dopey-faced kid with endless … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports
Tagged Billy Butler, Boo Cano, Brandon Leftridge, chubby hillbilly, Kansas City Royals, Z-Man
17 Comments
Leftridge: The Royals Are Going to the World Series Again
As easy as it is to pick apart the meaningless failings and triumphs of spring training, it’s just as easy to get irrationally emotional about the first three (or five, or twelve) games of the regular season. Spring training means … Continue reading
Posted in Brandon Leftridge, Sports
Tagged Alex Rios, Brandon Leftridge, KC Royals, Ol' Eddie Volquez, World Series
13 Comments
Leftridge: Crap for Sale on Craigslist, Opening Day Edition
Opening Day is upon us, but you already knew that. If you’re going, congratulations and I hate you. Most of us ham-and-eggers will be at work listening discreetly through a solitary ear bud, our faces quietly showcasing a roller coaster … Continue reading
