Author Archives: admin
Starbeams: NFL Axes Coaches for Answering Fans Prayers, Google as Foreplay, Katy Perry
Coaches from the New Orleans Saints have been suspended for encouraging players to injure players on other teams for money. Basically, they got in trouble for saying what I’m yelling at my TV every Sunday!
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Google has strung over 100 miles of cable in Kansas City and promises speeds 100 times faster than broadband and 1,000 times faster for uploads. I’m going to miss the slow downloads for the sites I visit because I’ve always considered it to be foreplay.
Glazer: Drag Bar Missie B’s Taking Over America’s Pub Space in Westport
This just in, the rumors are TRUE…
Missie B’s will take over the big corner America’s Pub held for years until this past January on Westport Road…
This sends a clear message. The iconic local gay bar and drag show deluxe club is ONLY coming to Westport because it has solved the hip-hop urban crowd issue with the departure of America’s Pub.
Hearne: Plaza Patron Weighs in on Urban Teen Problem Through Kid’s Eyes
At the risk of starting a comments section race riot and against my better judgement…
I’m going to share with you an interview I conducted on St. Patrick’s Day on the Country Club Plaza. A conversation with 39 year-old suburban mother of two, Ann Thompson. Thomson was there on a shopping spree at Urban Outfiters, H&M, Bananna Republic and Standard Style, if that tells you anything about her.
Thompson’s take on the scene outside Seville upon observing the behavior of dozens of black urban teens and the Plaza Security police in afternoon on a warm, sunny afternoon?
Jack Goes Confidential: ‘American Reunion, ‘Coulda, Shoulda, Woulda But Didn’t
AMERICAN REUNION– Scene # 1: Jason Biggs and Alyson Hannigan are now married with child and their union has turned stale…
He’s sitting on the bed rubbing one off into a tube sock while watching porn on his laptop.
Ooops, the young son walks in on him.
Scene # 2: Mom is taking a bath and giving her vag a workout with the handheld showerhead. You guessed it, the kid walks in on her as well.
So begins the 8th slice of American Pie which, at best, has become a bit stale since since its debut in 1999.
But credit AMERICAN PIE with jump starting the modern shock-humor romps which have flourished since with the likes of THE HANGOVER, BRIDESMAIDS and SUPERBAD.
Glazer: The Important News Today is Just a Reality Show
Who can keep up?
We’re all just waiting for the next horrible murder, the next scandal in Washington, the next kidnapping of a small child in Kansas City, and of course, the next time Charlie Sheen or some other name celebrity gets arrested for D.U.I. And let’s not forget the sports scandals either.
But how many of you have already forgotten the U.S. credit ratings drop last year?
There’s always so much to take in but so little time to think much about anything.
The "important" news comes at us so fast and so frequently, it’s impossible to even get one issue sorted out before nine more whack us in the kisser.
Hearne: Westport Invites Kansas City to Celebrate 420 Day on April 20th
Smoke ’em if you got ’em…
Don’t look now, but one of America’s most infamous holidays – 420 Day – is about to splash down in Westport. That’s right, local smoking rights champion Bill Nigro is spearheading an annual bash celebrating the fine art of smoking pot. Right here in River City.
"Well, we’re not calling it 420 Day," Nigro hedges. "Our event’s called the Westport Smokeout and we’re going to do some fun things. Jerusalem Cafe’s going to have a Hookah bar and our feature band is going to be The Pornhuskers."
Never heard of the legendary Pornhuskers? Read on.
Sounds Good: Sporting vs LA @ LIVESTRONG, Leo Kottke @ Uptown, Muder by Death @ Beaumont & Split Lip @ Bottleneck
A bunch of news that may be of interest to you awesome people who love soccer and music…
First, the soccer.
Tickets for the HUGE Sporting-LA Galaxy game this Saturday at LIVESTRONG are sold out.
However, there are still a few standing room tickets you can buy in a package that includes a ticket to the Montreal game on May 5th. And trust me, some of the standing room spots in LIVESTRONG are my favorite places to watch from, so the view will still be great. Plus, as an added bonus – you’ll be closer to the beer concession.
Think about it.
And Wakarusa pass prices are increasing this Saturday at 11:59 pm.
Whinery: Questionable Media Coverage and Trayvon’s Death
“But the most brilliant propagandist technique will yield no success unless one fundamental principle is borne in mind constantly and with unflagging attention. It must confine itself to a few points and repeat them over and over.”
—Adolf Hitler, Mein Kampf
In a smear campaign normally reserved for Republican candidates for President, George Zimmerman, the “alleged murderer” of Trayvon Martin, appears to have been thoroughly vilified by a vindictive media.
The “official” story goes as follows: racist white guy, without provocation and with malice aforethought, shoots and kills a defenseless black child… And for all I know- that may very well be the case… But there are some distortions I would like to point out.
Starbeams: Who Needs Sea Life KC When We Already Have Mighty Mo?
Over 30,000 tickets were pre-sold for Sea Life Kansas City when it opens this Friday Large crowds will filter through Crown Center to view the thousands of fish, sharks and other marine life.
Sea Life and Legoland Discovery Center Kansas City are part of a push to make Crown Center a weekend destination for visitors and stay-cationers. The thinking being, once school gets out, it will be packed everyday. I take my kids to the really cheap fish tank downtown – i’ts called Missouri River.
Hearne: The Bugs May Be Exterminated but E-Tickets Continue to Confuse
It’s been a slippery, seven-month slope since Kansas City went paperless…
You know, with e-tickets. so unless your an aging biker who likes to park illegally in front of LatteLand on the Plaza, chances are, you’re gonna get one of these one of these days – maybe just for parking somewhere in KC, so listen up.
Or you may end up like Stanford & Sons‘ Craig Glazer did three weeks back.
E-tickets are not your grandfather’s friendly, yellow, or beige, carbon copy tickets. Not even close.
They’re two-feet-long and four and a half inches wide to begin with.
Which is a lot to love, especially given what’s missing on them, namely the fine amount and where to mail it in. Suffice it to say, Glazer was verklempt, perplexed and confused.
He called the phone number on the ticket and landed in Kansas City’s 3-1-1 Action Center which proceeded to spit out prereorded, confusing water bill options before offering a municipal court, city services or a live body option.
Hearne: Law Breaking Bikers Get Pass from Police, Plaza, Who Opt Instead to Hassle Urban Teens
A funny thing happened on the way to the Plaza Saturday afternoon…
Those beefy biker dudes who commandeer the 15 Minute and No Parking spaces at 318 West 47th outside LatteLand – were nowhere to be found.
Had the Plaza finally forced Occupy LatteLand to find a new, legal home away from home? Had Police and Plaza Security finally teamed to enforce local traffic and parking laws – the ones that govern cars but for years have been ignored where hordes of illegally parked motorcyclists gather every weekend on the Plaza?
New Jack City: Holy Choked Chicken, 007 Dumps Shaken Martinis For Cold Suds
Is nothing sacred in Hollywood?
Apparently not.
James Bond is giving up his traditional shaken martinis for beer. And not just any beer, mind you. And thank God it’s not going to be for one of those sissy, light beers.
According to Advertising Age, Daniel Craig will be downing Heinekens in the next 007 action-adventure – SKYFALL – scheduled to open on November 9th. The film is directed by Sam Mendes and co-stars Javier Bardem.
In other words, brewed, not stirred.
Starbeams: Forget the So-Called Border War, Bring on the Moonshine Wars
Kentucky license plates read; "Unbridled Spirit." Kansas plates say, "Worst State for Skiing."
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Kentucky is the Bluegrass State. Lawrence is the Legalize Grass capitol of the nation.
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In the War of 1812 more than half of all Americans killed in action were Kentuckians. I once got in a brawl at Free State Brewing Company.
Starbeams: THE TOP 5 STADIUM NAMES THAT WOULD MAKE CHIEFS FANS PROUD
The Chiefs are reportedly looking to sell the naming rights to Arrowhead Stadium in an attempt to raise even more money for the team. As if $27 parking isn’t enough.
THE TOP 5 STADIUM NAMES THAT WOULD MAKE CHIEFS FANS PROUD:
#5. Amos Family Funeral Home Stadium.
#4. Midwest Hemorrhoid Treatment Center Stadium.
Donnelly: Sporting Off to Best Start Ever After Road Win at Chivas USA
Is Sporting Kansas City the best team in the MLS right now? Many knowledgeable observers think so.
KC is red hot right now, and they made history on Sunday with their 1-0 win at Chivas USA. Sporting moved to 4-0 on the season, the best start ever for the KC club.
Was it pretty? No, especially the first half that saw both teams engage in some physical play while creating few real chances.
But an away win is huge, no matter what it looks like and Chivas’ 0-3-1 record belies their talent, which includes speedy former KC winger Ryan Smith. Smith left Sporting early last season citing "family issues." In fact, the home side looked like the most dangerous team Sporting has faced yet this season, though luck wasn’t on their side as several near-chances missed the mark, including one off the post that should have been a goal.
Glazer: KU Coach Bill Self Poised to Pass Hank Stram as KC Area’s Top Coach
Consider Bill Self now as the legendary Kansas coach Bill Self…
Self received the Naismith Award yesterday as National Coach of The Year. He also received the Rupp Award as Best Coach. We all know the AP gave it to Missouri coach Frank Haith for getting MU off to its best overall record in history.
Self, in my opinion, deserved the national honor over Haith.
Self’s team was not picked to be even the Big 12 Champ by most, which they were. And they certainly were not expected to play in the national title game that they will tonight.
I found it amusing that Kansas City Star sports columnist Sam Mellinger wrote a front page story today about how KU being our only elite local team. That the Chiefs, Royals, K-State and MU have done almost nothing important for a generation.
Hmmmm….well at least somebody agrees with me.
New Jack City: Razzies a New Career Low for Adam Sandler
Sunday’s annual Razzie Awards honoring the previous year’s worst on film brought forth a new cinematic low…
Normally held on the night prior to the Oscars, the Golden Raspberry Foundation this year moved the event to a more befitting date, April Fool’s Day.
And what a distinction Sunday night was for Adam Sandler who swept the Santa Monica, California based event in all 10 catagories!
Sandler’s gawdawful cross-dressing comedy JACK & JILL is the first motion picture in the 32 year history of the Raspberry Awards to sweep EVERY award.
The movie was named worst picture and its entire cast, especially Sandler and Al Pacino, were singled out for their acting in the film. Making matters worse, another of Sandler’s 2011 turkeys called JUST GO WITH IT shares two awards—namely worst actor (Sandler) and worst director Dennis Dugan, who also directed JACK & JILL.
Here then are the official winners—or losers—in the 32nd annual RAZZIE AWARDS:
Jolly: The Best Part of Lakeside Tavern is the ‘Lake’ Not the ‘Food’
Mission Farms in Leawood is something of a recluse – kinda like a mini-Park Place hidden off Mission Road among six-figure condos…
And among some of the coolest, most diverse restaurant concepts in the burbs, Lakeside Tavern at 10551 Mission Road is the latest addition to the Farms hidden next to a man made pond. Although it’s not really a lake, it is a tavern and has one of the more impressive patios in town. Tons of space and a couple of fire pits set a casual party atmosphere which fits in nicely with the view.
Let’s just say it beats the hell out of sitting on the patio at the Blue Moose on 135th and staring at your car.
Donnelly: Yonder Mountain String Band Channels Earl Scruggs @ Liberty Hall, March 29, 2012
With the passing of bluegrass legend Earl Scruggs Wednesday, Thursday night’s Yonder Mountain String Band show at Liberty Hall became something of a tribute to the banjo pioneer.
Right off the bat, mando player Jeff Austin paid his respects, calling Scruggs an innovator and an influence. Later in the show, bassist Ben Kaufmann alluded to the fact that without Scruggs, YMSB would not be what they are today.
Indeed, Scruggs paved the way for today’s contemporary bluegrass and country acts, and is credited with basically inventing the three finger rolling style that most people automatically associate with banjo-playing.
Yonder belted out multiple Scruggs numbers over the course of two sets and an encore- along with their usual assortment of barn burners and ballads- to a raucous 2/3 full room of beards and summer dresses…
Hearne: Airport Parking Groupon, Anybody? Fly Me
From the ever short annals of Groupon – the email discount biz I’ve long defended – comes an unusual proposition…
Look, in spite of what some readers have groused and grumbled about, there are sound reasons for businesses such as restaurants and oil change artists to go the way of the Groupon. It’s a great way to advertise and reach a ton of potential new customers. The discounts – when well thought out and properly structured – make total sense.
As often as not, it’s win-win deal for both the issuer and the customer buying it.
And now that everyone under the sun is in the game, the question becomes, what won’t they Groupon?
