KC’s Bar-B-Que, San Francisco
Talk about the $64 million question…
In a recent city-to-city showdown between San Francisco Chronicle columnist Scott Ostler and Kansas City Star sports editor Jeff Rosen, the Left Coasters clearly won the day with a hilarious tongue-in-cheek beat down of Kansas City barbecue.
And let’s face it, when it comes to bragging rights – sports teams and livability aside – what does KC have to crow about besides our smoked meat?
Which is kinda why we’re famous for that – and little else – and why Ostler zeroed in on the subject.
Here’s another awful truth: Setting aside the fact that former San Fran refugee, former Chiefs quarterback Steve Bono made an ass of himself by saying San Francisco’s worst restaurant was better than KC’s best – from what I can tell, he was telling the truth.
That’s not to say we don’t have some excellent restaurants, but by most accounts, Frisco – as Rosen called it – is in a league of its own.
So let’s zero in on what KC’s famous for and try somehow to compare ours – sans tasting – to theirs.
Guess what? Turns out San Francisco has a barbecue fetish of its own.
As evidenced by this story last summer on sf eater.com
Arthur Bryant’s famous beef sandwich
“16 Essential Bay Area Barbecue Spots”
Somewhat oddly, the story kicks off with an apology of sorts:
“Say what you want about the Bay Area’s barbecue scene — these spots are good.”
No wonder Ostler didn’t bother pitting any of his local joints against KC’s finest.
Last but not least, in a bbq restaurant throw down between joints with poser names like, Pig in a Pickle, Memphis Minnie’s and CatHead’s (that’s right, “CatHead’s” – so named becuz the ‘cue comes with buttermilk biscuits “roughly the sized of a cat’s head).
So here we go…
The No. 1 barbecue restaurant in San Francisco is:
None other than,”KC’s Bar-B-Que”
You got it, San Fran’s finest is a rip off of the Cowtown.
Famous for its “KC-style ribs, potato salad, and more,” the story states.
Naturally, they had to tart it up with a far prissier presentation of what locals here are accustomed to. Stuff like fistfuls of white bread with grimy finger prints, courtesy of one of the questionably clean servers at Arthur Bryant’s.
The bottom line being…
Is Kansas City’s worst barbecue restaurant better than San Francisco’s best?
Earth-to-Scott…
Who would eat there?
The “Streets Of San Francisco” are strewn with needles, trash, mountains of detritus from tens of thousands of homeless drug addicts and drunks whose life is a bad GG Alin performance. The reason they are so good at “Smoked Meats” is because the citizens, thanks to the licentuous, sybaritic lifestyle of a city full of Caligula’s have Herpes sores on their meat, the size of the sand traps at the British Open. The blow flies that dominate the sights and sounds of activities on the “Streets Of San Francisco” are well fed and reproducing millions of maggots to nestle in and breed on the corpse of a once beautiful town, that is now a metaphor for all that is rotten in the state of California.
Against the backdrop of foraging, frenetic rodents the size of raccoons are conversations about Sanctuary Cities, Gender reassignments, freeing rapists into the streets and the problems of keeping “Poop Maps” up to date.
https://www.forbes.com/sites/adamandrzejewski/2019/04/15/mapping-san-franciscos-human-waste-challenge-132562-case-reports-since-2008/#45d84d655ea5
On a positive note, this is probably the ONLY city in the United States that is far too toxic for the Coronavirus to survive.
But sure…, yeah…, let’s order some food.
“when it comes to bragging rights – sports teams and livability aside – what does KC have to crow about besides our smoked meat?”
– re: ‘sports teams’ and ‘livability’… former ‘Show Me’ Kerouac wouldn’t want to live in either SF or KC today, if different reasons. Crime – pick your poison. Weather – always loved the change of season mid-west, but not the humidity and tornadoes – then again, flooding/mudslides and earthquakes make for left of center whimsy too; call it a wash.
Far as sports…
SF Warriors have played in 5 straight Championship Games (NBA’s Superbowl), won 3 in just the last 4 years alone (KC – doesn’t even have a team)
SF Giants 3x World Champions just the last decade – KC’s owner Madison Bumgarner staked and validated his claim 2014 – SF’s second of 3 in just 5 years
SF 49ers 5x World Champions – undefeated – last win ’95. KC? The 60’s will never die, unless Chiefs ever manage ‘get in the game’ terms merit (rings on their fingers) rather than overhype (bells on their toes) every ‘this is our year’ desperate plea, annually
________
Soccer anyone?
KC Wiz to Sporting soccer, so advantage to their grown men running around in little pants vs SF, sans (seems bass ackwards but as century 21’s a rooty tooty fruity world, no surprise.) Of note SF had a soccer team born in 2017 – won an Championship that very first year too as a matter of fact – then it folded by 2018.
IRONY ALERT ~ SF also had great ones past: (SFSFL) San Francisco Soccer Football League won the ‘Lamar Hunt US Open Cup’ championships many times – 1976, 1985, 1988, 1993 and 1994.
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Tasty BBQ? Advantage KC – its one & only (my buds choose ‘Gates’), truly no contest – Football? Nod Aykroyd in ‘Tommy Boy’ – “Savor the flavor, cause it sure as hell won’t happen again” (not that it ever has, gridiron.)
You know friends, it’s not that Kerouac would be mad if the swiss chiefs ever won an Superbowl (oh sure, me and Marciano would have to share 49-0 top honors before I ended fallen from the unbeaten ranks), the reality is… just don’t think they will/can.
For those whippersnappers today same a once ‘Not Jack’, best of luck…
😎
When I was in CA a number of years ago working I didn’t honestly find the food anymore spectacular than what’s around here. Was up to Frisco several times and to be honest the city didn’t impress me all that much. A couple of restaurants in the Fisherman’s Wharf area I liked but that was mainly because I like fresh caught fish prepared and served in a meal. Other than that just a lot of fast food places same as around here. The normal number of so called steakhouses serving over priced cuts of meat you could do just as well cooking at home at a fraction of the price. I found the better restaurants in both Frisco and LA as more places to be seen in not as places where the food was over the top great.
Clearly San Francisco has some great food.
I can attest that Cathead BBQ is legit (though it is my recollection that the owners are from Tennessee) http://catheadsbbq.com/ When I went there they did have some SF twists like serving Oxtail or Portabello but never the less if you love BBQ you should stop by.
However, Nothing in the Bay area BBQ joints even comes close to KC in the perfection of BBQ. This alone makes Bono, the biggest Bonehead of all time. Steve can take his Amuse-Bouche and Carmelized Black Cod with Seaweed Butter and Lemongrass oil.
I will take a stack of brisket, on grease soaked white bread with fries or should I call it Low shoulder of Angus, massaged with demarara sugar, pimenton, dehydrated onion and garlic hand mortared and pestled with care. Slowly roasted at low tempurature in an hand built brick smoker for 15 hours served with Au Jus and spiced stewed tomato with rare vinegar and cumin glaze on Pain de mie. Served with Frites.
Yep, maybe that will appeal to the SF crowd. GO CHIEFS!
Think you’re correct on CatHead, Greg…
All the bbq joint photos from SF make it look like…wait for it…Q39
Here is the guy who ran the “Poop Patrol”, he is hardly corrupt at all.
https://www.americanthinker.com/blog/2020/01/in_san_francisco_smell_of_poop_overpowered_by_stench_of_leftist_corruption.html
He probably got elected with the campaign slogan, “A Crapper On Every Corner”.
Influence by way of the stench of effluence.
Let’s order food.
I gotta say…a Gates Mixed Plate is really hard to beat. But that’s just me. Always love going to Gates. It’s an experience like no other bbq place in Kansas City.
I’ll second that, Guy…
But Generally stick with either short ends or chicken