Pardon the interruption but…
KCC reader and occasional contributor Chuck Lowe is worried. And not just about the usual suspects, you know, the fate of Malaysian Air Flight 370, Chelsea Clinton‘s baby and the Chiefs draft picks.
Nope, Ground Chuck is concerned about the girth of a certain former Kansas City Star sports columnist. Perhaps you know him, he goes by the name Jason Whitlock.
No kidding.
“Seriously, Whitlock is dead in two years if he doesn’t drop a buck fifty,” Lowe laments. “He’s fatter than the Federal Deficit. Honestly, I saw him in person not too long before he went to LA and I think he has put on at least 100 pounds. Dead in two years. This picture is from today on ESPN’s Pardon the Interruption. That’s my flash on my camera blowing up right over his heart. Poor guy really needs help.”
Don’t take this the wrong way; Lowe’s a fan.
“Hearne this is a big man,” he continues. “He played on the offensive line at Ball State and he has huge hands. Look at those hands next to that body. I swear he’s going to take Kristen Wiig’s place on Saturday Night Live in a Lawrence Welk skit if he doesn’t stop.”
The bottom line:
“If he lost 150 pounds he would look just like a guy that needed to drop 50 pounds,” Lowe says. “I’m thinking one of the reasons he is employable again is because this folks at the SPN feel sorry for him. I mean for crying out loud they call the guy Big Gravy. Again they are calling him big gravy on TV – no more Big Sexy.”
Wow that’s sad to hear. I saw him on PTI and he looked pretty good, now I see this photo, damn is that a new one? Yeah its hard to carry 375 to 450 if that’s the case. Most men who weigh that much don’t live much past 50, I would think Jason is close to 50 now. I hope he loses the pounds, I like the guy.
Glaze, he is 4 bills if he is an ounce.
Wow. I haven’t seen him in a long time. I always liked his columns and wish he was still here.
Good story, nicely done, Chuck!
Thanks, but I just texted some comments to Hearne.
🙂
The poor guy needs to get some help.
I usually watch PTI and caught Jason by accident on Thursday and Friday. Before he left for LA, I had seen him up close a couple of places by accident (KCI and Hooters, I was going into the Philly Cheesecake place, Hooters food is so, so bad…) and he was a big guy, butt (smirk) WOW!!
His sports takes were ok. His politics are predictable, but I did like him in KC. Controversy is fun. Honestly, I would like to see him lose some weight, cause he is HUGE. I know the camera adds 10 lbs, but come on…
If you go to PTI on line and watch the show, you will see, not only his girth, but his girth against a guy (Mike Wilbon) who claims to have problems staying under 220.
When Tony Riali came on on Friday, they clarified the “Big Gravy” comment by designating Wilbon and Riali as “Little” and “Medium” gravy. The unspoken jist of the comments, were in my opinion, a nod to “Big Gravy” going to the “Big Graveyard”. Watch it and you will see, no one is really laughing that much. That in turn, made me think, that in a weird way, Jason has “Eatin his way to the top.” The guy was near unemployable for a while and now, he is really getting some play on ESPN, in, what I think, might be a sympathy hire.
That said, I thought he produced yeoman’s work on Thursday and Friday in addition to his work last month, where he was again, featured on PTI.
I am really hoping the guy makes a move, before it is too late.
Playing the dead pool on anyone is morbid. I know a guy… a lawyer… and he and a group of pals get together every Ash Wednesday and lay down odds on who will die in the next 365 days. They meet, divide the winnings… and bet on next year… I saw JW at the I35 and Lamar Quik Trip just before he moved to LA… he looked great. Whitlock is extremely talented. He was great for Kansas City in both print and broadcast… I would like to see him back. I just don’t think anyone here will pay him what he deserves.
Oh yeah, I was gonna take another picture because the of the flash, but I thought the accident was prescient.
If we are counting, how many Suzie Kolbers to one Jason Whitlock?
I think it may be four.
Perhaps another trip to the Duke fat camp is in order. You would think that being so far removed from Gates would have been a good thing for him. I’m a fan of Jason so I hope he does something real soon to slim down some.
Looks like there’s plenty of food to be had in LA, PB…
Besides, don’t think for one minute that the Big Guy isn’t fully capable to getting his Gates fix via Fed X. Gates does a great job of wrapping its ribs for travel and shipment, FYI.
I took a couple slabs to Jack Soden at Elvis Presley Enterprises in Memphis just last month
“Hearne this is a big man,” he continues. “He played on the offensive line at Ball State and he has huge hands. Look at those hands next to that body. I swear he’s going to take Kristen Wiig’s place on Saturday Night Live in a Lawrence Welk skit if he doesn’t stop.”
LOL! You need to write some more stories, Chuck. I actually frequent KCC and TKC just to read your comments.