Royals fans. FINALLY. No more waiting…
This is a post season team RIGHT NOW. The Royals have a ferocious hitting attack,maybe the best in baseball. They will win closer to 90 games than 80. Eric Hosmer is an MVP candidate. He could well hit plus 40 homers. A first for any KC baseball player, including the former A’s in KC.
Look for a .320 average plus 120 RBI’s and 42 home runs from baseball’s NEW KING OF SWAT ERIC HOSMER.
More good news: The Royals have at least 5, count them 5, guys who can all hit more than 20 dingers this year. Hosmer, Alex Gordon,Mike Moustakas, Billy Butler and Jeff Francoeur. Oh yeah. The new guy Lorenzo Cain ain’t no punk…18 homers for him as well. This is a tough, tough batting lineup.
Allow me to be the first to say it; THE BEST OFFENSE THE ROYALS HAVE EVER HAD.
Worried about starting pitching? Who isn’t? Shocker! It’s just fine. Luke Hochevar will become a star right now. Danny Duffy, the new kid, might break through this year. Bruce Chen is decent and with the great defense and heavy hitters, might win 14 games. Jonathan Sanchez will be just fine. The bullpen is one of baseball’s best already. It’s stacked with outstanding arms, including Aaron Crow and Greg Holland. 
Wow. Look out American League.
I’d like to say the Royals win the division, it will be tough with Detroit in our way. They may win 100 and the Royals finish second with 90 plus, but in the playoffs. The Royals offense is just too strong to overlook.
Hosmer will continue to raise all ships, just like George Brett did in the 70’s and 80’s. He’s off to a great start with the team going 2 out of 3 against a strong Angels ball club. By the way they have the old King of Swing, Albert Pujols. Make way for the new KING…Eric Hosmer.
Hey, I pissed on these guys for years. Rightfully so, but thank you Dayton Moore.
You did it Dayton, our first winner in nearly 30 years. Thank you, sir. This is going to be a fun summer. Royals tickets will not be so easy to get come July. I know some of these guys will be leaving in four or five years, but that’s time enough to go to a WORLD SERIES. Hey maybe, just maybe, we can keep a couple of them. Give Eric his 250 million dollar contract next season. Keep the best player in the game right here in Kansas City while he is still willing to stay.
HA!
Utterly hilarious. Hyperbole and hot air.
Strike Two!
When the dust has settled on the 2012 Ole Roy-als, I’m sure your story on Missie B’s relocation will be far more accurate.
Walmart Royals
will deliver Walmart results, the wheels will again fall off the rickety wagon Moore is forced to manage.
I guess he wanted a challenge moving from Hotlanta to the Walmart of baseball teams.
Well, a challenge you have, Mr. Moore. Good Luck.
You Gotta Believe
Saw those salaries ..
Yanks 200M Phils. 173m. Rangers. 120M… Scroll down to Royals 62M. Give me under on everything you just wrote.
We’re All Suckers for April Magic
I like this team and am optimistic, but it’s April nothing matters.
What really frustrates me is the current fetish for the home run.
Yeah, they’re rare, so they’re fun to see.. Which underscore the fact most run production comes from working baserunners to the plate.
I’m glad to see more base-stealing and inside ball.
Hope the new and returning fans do, too.
Craig, suggest you check out the Detroit Tigers when they come to town next week. That’s what a championship team looks like. Take a hard look at them – pitching, bullpen, offense – and get back to us. Go watch Cabrera and Fielder eat Bruce Fucking Chen for lunch, while Justin Verlander strikes out ten. See you there.
The commenters are actually going easy on you, Craig. The Royals’ starting pitching is horrific and this team will be lucky to win 80 because of it.
Tigers? Pfffft.
The Tigers are still reeling from getting slapped out of the World Series in 2006 in a mere 5 games by the St Louis Cardinals. Who, by the way are the defending World Series Champions. Want to see a championship franchise? Look to St Louis.
Oh and nice series by Alex Gordon by going Oh fer Anahiem.
Thanks for the laugh, CG
I realize you are writing tongue in cheek or are just otherwise… uh, narratively f******g with the heads of readers – and you’re doing a fine job, wonderful even.
OK, I’ll play along.
The Royals are the ‘real deal’? Is that in a Greg Hill sense as he was annointed real by Marty Schottebheimer a decade & more ago? Truth is, Dayton Moore’s bunch is but a different shade of blue, the LA Dodgers midwest – two pitchers especially come to mind and neither is named Joakim Soria, also a former Dodger farmhand.
KC is a bit younger yet just as likely to win anything post season (let alone reach said) as the bumbling Dodgers, my team since the 1950’s. If you count on Dodger castoffs as saviors, you become Gilligan on an island all your own and like a drowning man clings to shipwreck, you mistake ransom for reward, deliverance for disappointment… and no rescue.
“Luke Hochevar will become a star right now.”
– that’s what the Dodgers thought when they drafted ‘Bitter Beer Face’ as he was labeled by one blogger some 7+ years ago… almost had him signed and sealed but alas not delivered, thanks to Agent Scott Boras playing hi$ game. Hochevar is now nigh on 29 an sub .500 career that saw him have his best season in 2011 when he went [ drumroll ] .500 [ rimshot / cymbal crash]. He’s won 31 games and it’s only taken him 5+ seasons… be afraid Denny McLain, be very afraid.
Even funnier is the ommision your pitching reference to Royals closer Jonathan ‘The Biggest Man in the World’ Broxton (a nick given him by former player Mark Grace.) Broxton was formerly the Dodgers closer (which is sort of like saying Jonathan formerly weighed less than the Titanic and also pitched less like a sinking ship in relief.)
He was let go by LA, among concerns arm troubles, waistline and the mental makeup/pressure of pitching on the national stage Hollywood, beyond (I know all this because I’ve been an Dodgers fan since the 1950’s.) Give him time, and you’ll learn to expect disappointment too.
In other words, assume the position: Royals fans (as Chiefs) are familiar with it – long suffereing, unrequited hope, disabused… and so it goes.
Kerouac, you forgot the fan’s
gaping poopholes from being anally violated by an owner that does not care about winning, just swimming in beds of walmart money.
A Royals Sandwich Recipe
Get 2 slices of great bread (this woud be April and September) then put big pile of dog shit (May-August) on both slices of the bread. This team usually gives us a decent start and finish and not much else.
I’m Excited
But jeezuz, easy there, Craig. Let’s make sure they don’t shit on themselves in Oakland (where they’ve always struggled) following the positive vibes of this past weekend. Let’s see how the 4th & 5th starters do before anointing this team as the second coming of the 70s/80s-era Royals. Lineup is good and top 3 starters are at least bonafide ML starters, but the Tigers already have the Central knocked. The Royals could benefit from the unbalanced schedule by beating up on Clev., Chi. and Minn. to finish in 2nd place at or near .500 and use that momentum going into 2013/14 when they’ll be more likely to contend.
And to the Walmart naysayers, please can that tired and false mantra, the current payroll means shit as compared to the big boys. The TRUTH is the Royals front office has stepped up as they have shit tons of $ invested in their young guys, in fact MLB record payouts in signing bonuses (figures that don’t show up in annual payrolls) to these kids as well as their Latin development prospects, so either get behind ownership or at least be creative and come up with something new besides the “their cheap and don’t care about winning” drivel that was a very legit criticism pre-Dayton.
don’t worry PB,
when all these up-and-comers get ready for their payday the Royals shall dump them quicker than a stripper cans glazer after the check clears. We have seen it before, we shall see it again- talent leaves KC time after time to hit paydirt and championships elsewhere.
BO KNOWS…….YOU ARE INSANE!!!
glazer, you did that to get a rise out of everybody…good job
this team hasnt had 90 wins since 1989
hasnt been to the playoffs since 1985
ps…i wonder how much money glazer makes per column here…if he has the COJONES…he would tell us all
If Hearne had the cojones he would get rid of Glazer then we have a nice website that other better writters might want to be a part of.
What do you say to that?
can’t wait..
opening day in baseball…its super. Theres nothing better than a day out there at the k watching royals.
for those of us who have supported the team in these lean years…this hopefully will be payback for
all those long innings.
Great bball season with ku and missouri (downer at the end)…hopefully the royals keep things exciting
thru the summer and just read chiefs got an A rating in freee agent by sports expert…
could be fun…hope everyone comes out and supports the team….
True To A Point
Dude but have you not noticed some of the recent signings? A pretty good core group of Gordon, Butler, Escobar, Perez have already been extended thru at least 2016 and the Royals hold the rights to the younger guys (Hos, Moose, young arms) thru the same time frame which allows them a good chance of fielding a winning club thru at least the next 3 or 4 seasons. The key to all this will be signing Hosmer long-term and if I were the Royals, I’d offer him up a 10-12 year commitment right now similar to what other smaller market teams have done with the likes of Votto, Braun, Longoria before he even comes close to testing the waters. That would be the only possible chance of keeping a Boros client like him that has already shown himself to be a can’t miss stud.