Yearly Archives: 2011
Glazer: Forget Local/National Media Spin, The Economy Still Sucks!
Well, Kansas City is your income going UP?
Is your home’s value increasing? Do your friends brag about how great business is? The answer is a loud NO! Then how come CNN and CNBC as well as most news outlets say, "We’re out of the recession and people are spending again!"
The stock market proves it, right? It’s doubled in three years since the crash.
I do think – or rather believe – that it’s gotten so bad here our government’s begged the media to deliver good news on the economy for a change. TV did this, especially on the financial channels and evening news. Things are better speeches. Invest in restaurant chains, people are eating out, shopping, buying cars, going on trips.
So they say.
Today: Something Fishy This Way Swims, Tiny Crown Center Aquarium to Obliterate Halls Store
When it comes to money losers, there are a lot of ways to cut the cake…
Which brings us to the just-announced, $15 million aquarium going into Crown Center. This isn’t the first time a local fish wish has been tossed about. But this is no pie-in-the-sky, it’s the real deal.
Not that there won’t be casualties…
The aquarium will knock out the first floor Hall’s Crown Center’s mens store and all or part of its second floor where cards, silver and china are displayed. The third floor womens section will reportedly remain intact. The men’s store will reopen after moving to the retail part of Crown Center.
So will it work? Yes and no.
Frankly $15 million is chump change where aquariums are concerned.
STARBEAMS: Bye Bye Kansas Arts; Hello School Lunch Fatties; Sprint Breathes Blaine Magic into its Echo
Kansas Governor Sam Brownback signed an executive order to shut down the Kansas Arts Commission that will save the state $600,000 a year.
Most of that money was spent on glue for paper plates and noodles.
A study out of Michigan shows kids who regularly have school lunch are 29 percent more likely to be obese than kids who brought lunch from home.
I don’t know about you but Tater Tot Day was the only thing that made me want to go to school.
The good news is most Missouri kids keep the weight off after they take up smoking.
Glazer: Forget the Political Hot Air & PC, Cops Need to Drop the Hammer on Bad Guys Now!
The front page of the Kansas City Star shouts that crime is the top issue in the upcoming KC mayor’s race.
They just now figured that out?
And each Candidate gave a short answer to the problem. Oh brother!
Mike Burke wants to bring back Mayor Cleaver’s "Night Hoops." Let the kids know it’s OK to snitch and don’t drop out of school and get some cops to the schools to watch them.
My take: Didn’t work the first time, Mike. These folks want to go out and have fun, not shoot baskets. They want to get high and get laid. Simple as that. So not a good answer to the problem.
STARBEAMS: Yogurt Squirt in New Mexico and Stunning Revelation About A.M. Sex
A woman in New Mexico tried a sample of yogurt at a grocery store and thought it tasted like sperm. The police tested it and now they’ve confirmed that yes, indeed, it was that special sauce.
They suspect a yogurt worker did it. The good news? I can now write YOGURT WORKER on my résumé!
She should have been suspicious when, instead of labeled Dannon, the carton was labeled DAN.
On another note …
New research indicates that couples who have sex every morning are healthier and happier.
If you want to read more on this stunning news story, just google the word, "duh."
STARBEAMS: Super Bowl Anthem and Ball Park Lyrics Revisited
TOP 5 LINES CHRISTINA ALMOST SANG IN THE NATIONAL ANTHEM:
#5. What so proudly we watched at the Twilight special screening…
#4. If you beat up someone in a hotel we call that Charlie Sheening…
#3. Ben Roethlisberger is staring at my ass and dreaming…
#2. I’m a Jeannie in a bottle, you’ve gotta rub me the right way…
#1. I wonder if Aaron Rodgers would be my Packer?
When I sang Take Me Out to the Ball Game at Kauffman Stadium, I almost said,
"Buy me some peanuts and SEVEN DOLLAR BEER"
Super Bowl ads really work! I just bought a VW, installed Bridgestone tires & filled it with Doritos.
I’m still looking for a friendly beaver….
New jack City: Controversial Director Kevin Smith Headed to the Midland!
He’s at it again!
Controversial filmmaker Kevin Smith (Clerks, Dogma, Jay & Silent Bob) showed off his latest film called RED STATE at the recent Sundance Film Festival but surprised attending studio film buyers when he auctioned the release rights off to himself for a reported $20.
The Smith directed RED STATE, a $4 million production co-starring Michael Angarano, John Goodman, Michael Parks, Kevin Pollak and Stephen Root, has been described as going from Psycho to Westboro to Waco. The film will be self-distributed by Smith and his production company.
A national release date is set for October 19. But prior to that, Smith is taking the film on the road for something he’s calling the RED STATE U.S.A. TOUR.
Tony: We’re Living in the Golden Age of Groupon, Internet Discounts And Cynicism
With no cheerleaders, no real marquee players and just a close and competitive game among palookas, the most recent Super Bowl didn’t leave much of a memory.
In fact, the lost tape of The Kansas City Chiefs in their long gone Super Bowl glory was probably more noteworthy.
Additionally, the Super Bowl is really just an excuse to sell stuff and I’m probably not the only one who was uninspired by Eminem posing for Detroit and Chrysler propaganda.
However, a bit of Dark Humor and politically correct controversy was my highlight to a close game that was strangely uninspiring.
Groupon‘s Tibet Spoof ad targeted the celebrity-spokesperson-tragedy-of-the-month mindset, but also poked fun at the culture of consumerism that all prime-time TV events love to promote. It’s rare that something even a little bit subversive finds its way onto TV and this was close enough for alternative thought for me.
Allow me to explain:
Today: The Case of the Uncorrected Error & the Mike Hendricks/ Derek Donovan Tap Dance
It’s like this…
Unhappy with how the Kansas City Star blithely presented the results of a recent study about the smoking ban having no measurable effect on bars and restaurants, KC Business Rights Coalition head Bill Nigro took it to the next level.
"I called up Jessie Barker, the editor of the reporter who wrote the story," Nigro says. "And I told him all I got was like two sentences in there about making people go outside like animals to smoke and how now people werre outside drunk and unattended to."
Nigro’s quotes were accurate, but were asides in a 20 minute presentation citing examples of small businesses hurt by the ban.
Long story short, the editor agreed to have columnist Mike Hendricks call him and do a followup story.
Here’s where it gets ugly…
Take 5: MU/KU Game Notes From Inside Allen Fieldhouse
Sitting a few rows behind the Kansas bench in Allen Fieldhouse is a great place to get a unique perspective of the Missouri/Kansas basketball rivalry. Here are my notes from number-two-ranked Kansas’ 103-86 win over the game-but-overmatched Tigers on Big Monday. · Bill Self has a little Frank Martin in him. He’s just a whole lot better at hiding it than the volatile K-State coach. Inside KU’s team huddles, Self goes off on his players with much of the same ferocity as Martin – minus the Goodfellas stare. Self spent a good portion of the Mizzou game pissed, especially at his two point guards, Tyshawn Taylor and Elijah Johnson. I almost felt sorry for these two the way Self would yank them in and out of the game depending on their latest bad pass or poor defensive play. Somehow Self makes all this work. No coach I know of can juggle as much talent as KU annually attracts and keep everyone happy with their minutes and stats. Self’s greatest asset as a coach – aside from his ability to recruit studs – may be his ability to manage egos better than anybody in the college game.
· Self never yelled at three players; Thomas Robinson, Brady Morningstar and Tyrell Reed.
Glazer: THREE MORE WOUNDED, TIME FOR URBAN DANCE CLUBS TO LEAVE WESTPORT
In the face of yet another late night shoot out it’s time to bid adieu to the last black dance club in Westport.
That would be America’s Pub, the scene of 24 year-old Brian Euston’s demise last fall. Failed Westport black club Karma closed quietly three weeks back. And speaking of failed nightclubs, neither America’s Pub nor Karma were originally designed to attract black clientel.
They switched to an urban theme after efforts to attract white patrons failed.
The KC Star had a tiny brief on the shootings that went down at 2:30 AM Sunday (really Saturday night). Three were shot and wounded, all blacks, even though the overall violence in Westport is down.
Now Westport must once again try and mount another a PR comeback.
Glazer: Humble Scribe Crows About Super Bowl Super Bash, Predicted Packers Win
Woodside did it right, fun food, cheap drinks, nice crowd…
I,n fact some of my favorite KC Confidential commenters came. Including the smoking hot Mermaid, Debbie Mandry and former Chiefs running back Ted McKnight. I think I ate too much chili and got nervous as the game score got too close for comfort.
That’s if you had the Packers like I did.
The Packers Aaron Rogers – as I broke it down beforehand – brought his A game. Big Ben, well, he didn’t.
New Jack City: $uper Sunday, How the Ratings & Local Ads Played Out Here in KC
Say what you will, but Sunday’s SUPER BOWL was one for the record books with a 47.9 national overnight rating!
That’s the biggest audience for the game since the 1987 bowl and up some 3% over last year’s gridiron grindathon.
What’s more, here in Kansas City the telecast of the game on WDAF-TV produced an incredible 53.6 rating with a mind blowing 74.6 Share!
The game itself: GREAT! The national commercials? Maybe not so much this year.
I didn’t think they lived up to previous Super Bowl advertising efforts.
Starbeams: It’s Tuff Work If You Can Get It, Sprint Magic Trick & Oil Spill Windfall
The Chiefs have promoted offensive line coach Bill Muir. Rumor has it no one else would take the job under Todd Haley because he is impossible to work for. Same reason I write for Hearne Christopher.
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Overland Park based Sprint has hired magician David Blaine for a publicity stunt but nobody seems to know what the magic trick will be. Let’s hope he can magically erase the Bill Esrey and Gary Foresee eras.
Shauna: Don’t Kill Cupid, Breath Life Into Him This Valentine’s Day
A few days ago I went to Walgreens and had a giant epiphany…I hate Valentine’s Day!
Or maybe it’s just all of the thoughtless, very odd crap that goes along with it! The strange-looking plush hearts with arms that speak "baby talk." Those really cheesey, EXPENSIVE pieces of jewelry with all the red and hot hot pink enamel
Am I the only one who sees that Open Hearts collection bracelet and wants to throw up?
The 10 pound boxes of chocolates that make even die-hard chocolate lover’s stomachs turn. Really? Does anyone actually want any of that? I know, I know. People always say it’s the thought that counts. But what kind of thought actually goes into purchasing a chocolate foil covered rose at the register while buying foot ointment and deodorant stick?
Not a whole lot!
OTC: Super Bowl 45 Has Something For Almost Everybody
“I disagree with all these guys saying game lived up to the billing. It was supposed to be one of the all time greats. I don’t put it there. Good game, but we’ve seen some great ones of late. This one wasn’t great, IMO.”Nate Bukaty, Twitter
GH: Super Bowl 45 was one of the all-time greats. Great drama, great commercials, great halftime show and great outtakes like ARod getting finger-fed popcorn by Cameron Diaz and Christina Aguilera flubbing lines in the National Anthem. Plenty of juice for the family to cuss and discuss for the four-hour game.
“How is it, given all the time you have to prepare, you can mess up the national anthem? Riddle me that, Christina Aguilera.”
Bob Wolfey, columnist, Milwaukee Journal Sentinel
GH: The pop singer was ripped on Twitter almost immediately for her anthem miscues as if she was Jay Cutler sitting out the second half. Did she screw up? Yeah, but that’s what happens sometimes when you sing the anthem on live TV. I was not nearly as bothered by her screw up as some. Read on.
Bob Wolfey, columnist, Milwaukee Journal Sentinel
GH: The pop singer was ripped on Twitter almost immediately for her anthem miscues as if she was Jay Cutler sitting out the second half. Did she screw up? Yeah, but that’s what happens sometimes when you sing the anthem on live TV. I was not nearly as bothered by her screw up as some. Read on.
Jennifer: Cellar & Loft Splashes Down in Style in the Rivermarket
Years ago I was shopping in Brookside and stumbled upon a place called Cellar & Loft.
It was a multi-story shop selling wine and craft beer. I remember thinking what a great concept this would be downtown, among a younger crowd in an action packed neighborhood. The universe must have grabbed onto my vibe, because that is exactly what happened.
I hadn’t been able to make it over to this new neighborhood addition yet, even though it is just a couple blocks from my pad. One Friday night, I was headed down Walnut on the way to dinner and noticed the lights were on. I pulled into a spot right in front of the door and just like it was meant to be, left a silent street and entered into a buzzing tasting room.
JAZZ TIME: Papa Marsalis is coming to town
You can bet Ellis Marsalis knows his jazz.
All you have to do is check out his progeny: Wynton, Branford and Delfeayo. So it’s a special night when the senior Marsalis vacates his usual New Orleans haunts and plays a gig up here in Cold Town. He’ll be warming the 88s Friday night at the Folly Theatre, 12th and Central downtown. Show starts at 8; they talk about it at 7.
Today: Esquire Writer Blasts Whitlock, Kisses Up to Posnanski
The battle of defunct local sports-osaurs forges ahead…
Kansas City’s had its share of sports rivalries. The Royals and Yankees. The Chiefs and the Raiders. Jason Whitlock and Joe Posnanski. With an underlying theme of good versus evil always in play. Whitlock wearing the black hat, JoPo the white.
It’s been more than a year, but you remember. Those loveable/hateable clowns who used party with me down at 18th and Grand in the pages of the Star. Oh, make no mistake, there was indeed a strong sibling rivalry between effusive Joe and the erosive Jason.
Donnelly: Sporting KC Emphasizes Athleticism, Fitness With New Look Squad In 2011
The Wizards are dead. 
No, don’t be sad, it was a great run while it lasted. Pay your respects and move on, that’s what the Wizards would want for you.
Say hello to Sporting Kansas City. Brand new name. Brand new team crest. Brand new team colors and jerseys. Brand new players. Brand new enthusiasm and buzz. And oh yeah, brand new stadium on the way.
The question is, can KC soccer fans expect to see some new results on the field? I mean, all that new stuff is great for the marketing people to tout in the offseason, but the play on the field is what really matters, right? Remember, last year’s Wizards had high hopes heading into the season, but ended up 11-13-6 and missed the playoffs…
