Tony: I Want Gordon Gekko To Kill The Star

For years Kansas City’s paper-of-record has been in distress and blamed most of its problems on corporate debt loads and the economy and not their own incompetence. Now it seems that blaming the world of high finance for the downfall of “Dead Tree Media” might actually be somewhat justified but still too late to benefit any of the former newsies currently working soulless PR gigs.

The New Hotness: Old and Busted Newspaper Companies are now the target of vicious hedge funds looking to cash in on so much bad debt.

Let’s take a look how it works so that print media d-bags might understand exactly why they’re going to get the ax.

First the bad news, hedge funds see weakness in the newspaper sector and they’re buying up the debt.

Now check the method . . .

“Their basic strategy: Quietly buy up as much cheap, delinquent debt as possible and then fight it out in Bankruptcy Court for a lucrative settlement that transforms the debt into a large share of company stock.”

Don’t believe for a second that Hedge Funds want to run and own newspapers.

Now, here’s where the Gordon Gekko reference comes in to play. Given that these profit machine hedge funds probably don’t want to go out and play community reporter, the only logical outcome of their investment is clear:

Hedge Funds Could Be A Major Factor In Busting Up And Selling Off The Most Profitable Pieces Of Newspaper Companies.

There is already precedent for this given that last year the most profitable thing The New York Times did was sell some of their precious real estate.

Star Newsies constantly brag about their profitable printing biz but the obvious question is: Why does a great printing biz need a Daily News loss leader hanging around its neck like an albatross?

Dead Tree Media assets are just asking to be sold off at a premium with only the carcass of of a news division left in the aftermath. It’s a business move that’s past due and I can only hope that maybe a few Hedge Fund Masters Of The Universe might find this humble post and my recommendation that McClatchy stock is cheap, loaded with debt and the assets controlled by their Kansas City paper is just begging to be sold for scrap.

Of course there are arguments to the contrary.

This year’s 1st Quarter Report For The Newspaper Industry reveals declining losses which almost seems like good news for so many desperate Newspaper people.

Hey, Steve Jobs is also willing to throw newspapers a bone if they help to build subscription apps for his Ipad. Thing is, any music aficionado will note, the number of folks who pay for music on Itunes is nearly insignificant compared with all the folks who